[Anonymous]

I recently met this gal I was introduced to for about a week now. She really likes me, and I thought I did too, but relealized that she is not who I really want to be with. Your probably saying “big deal, your not married, but dating”. The problem is, is that she is really going through a tough time recently. I’ve worked hard to become independent, debt-free, successful for me, and happy. She works only part time, has a young child, is in debt, and has no real life goals in her life. I am a single father of 2 daughters and had some really tough times myself.

My question is, how do I let her know that I do not sish to pursue this any longer as a relationsip, to stay friends, and to not leave her feeling horrible and abandon? I have been working on bettering myself in relationships and don’t want to do this wrongly.

Any advice would be appreciated. Thanks.

[April Masini, your AskApril]

Don’t try to stay friends with her if you’re not going to date her. It’s going to make things much harder for her if you do. Instead, you can just stop calling her and if it seems like she’s upset about this, explain that she’s a great person, but you’re not a match. Not everyone is going to be a match for you and not everyone is going to be a match for her. That’s the bottom line, and that’s why what I’ve described is really all you have to do. If you try to do more than that, after only a week of dating, you’re going to complicate things. There’s no way she is going to feel horrible and abandoned after only dating for a week — and if she does have those feelings, it’s not because of you.

I hope that helps, and that you’ll follow me @AskAprilcom on Twitter and on Facebook at this link: [url][/url].

[Member]

Posts