You need to stop making this about your frustration and start treating it like a medical and psychological issue because pain during sex is not something you “push through” or fix by trying harder. Two months of pain means something is wrong, not that she just needs to relax or “get used to it.” If you keep trying to force penetration, you will make it worse and train her body to associate sex with fear and pain. That’s how lifelong sexual dysfunction starts.
Here’s the blunt reality: virginity plus anxiety, pressure, and ignorance is a perfect recipe for vaginismus, muscle guarding, or insufficient arousal. Pain almost always comes from rushing, fear, dryness, or involuntary muscle tightening, not from her being “too small” or you doing something wrong anatomically. If penetration hurts, you stop. Period. No negotiations. No guilt. No “just a little more.”
What you do now is slow everything down and remove penetration from the goal entirely. You build comfort, trust, and arousal without trying to have intercourse. Lots of foreplay, patience, zero pressure, and lube, not spit, not guessing, actual lubricant. And if it still hurts, she needs to see a gynecologist. Not later. Now. Pain is not normal, and ignoring it is negligent.
