[beachxgirl]

me and my boyfriend met on plentyoffish in may. we started talking everyday, & hanging out a lot. he asked me to be his girlfriend at the end of June. in the beginning he mentioned possibly joining the army, and he enlisted in the middle of July. even though we hadn’t been dating long, it’s been difficult for me because on the one hand I thought it would be easier to end things now because he is leaving in January, but the bigger part of me wants to spend these last months with him and enjoy every moment I have with him, even if it means getting my heart broken. I’ve recently decided that taking risks and getting your heart broken is worth it in the end, but you will never know if you never try. so we have decided to stay together and see what happens when January comes. however, lately he seems preoccupied and we just went to ocean city together and he was talking about how a relationship is going to be hard when he’s away. he will be gone for 6 months first and then he’s not sure what will happen. he said what if you meet someone, I don’t wanna hold you back, or what if I meet someone and I have to explain to you in a 4 minute phone call that this isn’t going to work out. he told me he’s gonna write me and he’s going to miss me so much and he said it’s crossed his mind if he’s being a jerk for staying with me right now when he knows he’s leaving but then he said “but then I thought to myself..no I love her and I wanna be with her right now” everything had been going great until I found out he still is active on his plentyoffish account. I was heartbroken. it was recently updated and it said “looking for a relationship” I confronted him about it and he told me he uses it as a Facebook, it’s to make friends, it’s nothing at all. he said he doesn’t pursue anyone and he doesn’t get messages anyways. he asked if I wanted him to delete it, and I said “yes that would make me feel better” and he did delete it, which I appreciated. but lately my insecurities are getting the best of me, every little thing he does that seems off I relate to him having that account, and I told him to not waste my time, and if he just wants to be single and have fun for his last 6 months, then let me know. he told me he wants to be with me, and the only reason he would see to end things is if he wasn’t spending as much time with his family (which isn’t the case) but he doesn’t have the desire to be single and hookup with girls. I’ve met his parents, he’s met mine, and I am trying to let go of the whole account thing. I care about him so much, and I don’t know how to shake off the negative thoughts. & the other night I brought up his ex and asked if he missed her and he said “sometimes like I see things she bought me and I wonder what she’s up to” and now I see they just became Facebook friends & I saw them messaging ughh

1. does he have feelings for me?
2. does he seem to want to be with me?
3. why do you think he had the account?
4. is friending the ex girlfriend a big deal?

[April Masini, your AskApril]

Please do not create new names and ask the same questions! 😕 I already answered your questions at length on this relationship when you posted them here: https://www.askapril.com/forums/viewtopic.php?f=1&t=214411&p=235693&hilit=plentyoffish#p235693.

[Member]

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