[coacj]

Hi April, I’ve know this girl Tiffany for a year now. When we first met each other she liked me but I wasn’t too sure if I did. She was nervous around me too. I hung out with Tiffany and her family twice last summer and things were cool. But then all of a sudden she started acting funny. I got turned off and left her alone. She hit me up a couple of months later apologizing for the way she acted. She said it was because she was fat and insecure and I was nice looking and in shape. I still wasn’t sure about her so I left her alone. So ima fast forward to this July. She contacted me on Facebook telling me happy birthday, I said thanks and left it at that. A week later she contacted me about meeting and getting drinks. I told her I didn’t know if it was a good idea, but this time I kept in contact with her. I met up with Tiffany and her 1yr old daughter a week later and we talked. Tiffany lost alot of weight and was in better shape. She was telling me that she wasn’t the same person she was last summer and that she wanted me to see that. After that we started contacting each other again. We went on our 1st date last Saturday. I didnt hold her hand on the date because i didnt feel like it was the right time. Tiffany told me on the date that she like talking with me and she feels comfortable around me, she feels like she could tell me anything. Then Tiffany told me she dated a guy earlier this year and that they got physical. But the guy didn’t want to be wit her and that she was hurt by that. Tiffany said she is done with him and that the guy contacted her after but she cut him off. That alarmed me because I said how do I know she doesn’t still like him. Then we were talking about relationships and tiff said that if a guy doesn’t show her interested she will put them in the friend zone quick. I don’t know if that was a hint at me. After the date I took her home and she told me to call or text when I got home. But I noticed after our date, the past couple of days I’ve been the one calling her first now. Is this normal after the first date? And Does it sound like she likes me?

[April Masini, your AskApril]

It is very normal for the guy to pursue the woman, so you should be the one calling and texting. 😉 And… it does seem like she likes you. My advice is to ask her out on a second date and get to know her further. You have very little to lose and a lot to gain. 😀

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[coacj]

Thanks for the advice. I’ve gotten women but never pursued them hard. I guess because of a ego problem I had. I always thought I shouldn’t have to put in so much work to get a woman. But I’ve been told in the past that I wasn’t agressive enough when it came to that. So I wanna change my old ways because I don’t want to be single forever lol. My plan for tiffany is to just be consistent. Not be too aggressive and blow up her phone, but consistent contact everyday, a call or text in the early day and a call later on in the day.

[coacj]

Thanks, it’s just that I never persued women hard cause I never wanted to look like I was chasing them. But I’ve been told in the past that my personality is layed back but that I’m not that aggressive. And actually Tiffany told me last summer that I wasn’t aggressive either, but that was when I wasn’t sure if I liked her. So it’s hard for me to do it because I always think the woman isn’t interested if I gotta put work into it.In the past if it was taking to long I stopped showing the woman attention and some of the women actually got a little attitude that I stopped. But I didn’t understand why they would if they wasn’t giving me anything to work with. Im tryin to be consistent, it’s new for me. Like when should she start back calling me first or is it always me?

[April Masini, your AskApril]

I’m not sure why you didn’t want to be perceived as pursuing women, since that’s what guys do! 😉 You mentioned an ego problem, and my advice is to work on that because it’s keeping you from getting what you want. Read Date Out of Your League, a book I wrote for men who want to win with women: [url]https://www.askapril.com/relationship-dating-advice/think-and-date-like-a-man.html[/url]. It’s going to help you a lot! 😀

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[coacj]

I’ve always heard stories from guys saying they chased a woman for months and i would say to myself is he doin the right thing? But sometimes the guys ended up wit the women. Then i would hear women say how a guy was chasing them or the guy was blowing up their phone and I took that as women losing respect for those guys so I said to myself I’ma do the opposite. So most of my life women would tell me I’m too layed back and couldn’t figure me out. it’s hard since I’ve stuck to my guns the whole time but I wanna change, it’s gonna be a process but I wanna stay consistent.

[April Masini, your AskApril]

Read the book I suggested. 😉

[coacj]

Ok thanks 😉

[coacj]

I spoke with Tiffany today and I don’t know what to make of this. I had brought up horoscopes and I mentioned leos because I’m a Leo. She said I don’t know I think me and leos would bump heads because I dated one and it didn’t work out. So then I said well I’m a Leo, and that I don’t know that guy but I’m different from him. So tiffany said I don’t know I think if we were in a relationship we would bump heads. I said maybe, maybe not, nobody knows cause were not in one. So then I asked her about sat night. She said yea I had a good time we went out as friends, I’m not rushing nothing but as we hangout we get to know each other. I said yea I’m not rushing anything either. I told her I’m feelin you but I want to take it slow as well. She didn’t say if she liked me or not, it’s kinda up in the air. I mean I don’t know if I said the right thing but I had to speak my mind. Then I said to myself if she wasn’t curious about Me then why would she try to get back in touch wit me for the 3rd time. I don’t know what to make of this, what do you think of this?

[April Masini, your AskApril]

Read the book! 😉 😉 😉

You’ll get a lot more advice than I can give you here, and it’s all relevant to the questions you’re asking me. I don’t recommend one of my books to everyone, but when I see questions that can clearly be answered (and then some), by one of my books, I suggest you read it. 🙂

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