[kiterider123]

I met my roommates sister a few weeks ago….as a group we have all hung out three times. (he is very okay with this situation).

The second time we hung out she told me she noticed how pretty my eyes were, she told her mom she found me very cute and very athletic. During this visit we hung out a little and talked a good amount and I even got her number.

The third time we hung out we as a group rented a lake house and hung out on the boat all weekend and had a great time…She and I talked more flirted a lot….she even said a few times right to me, “you are soo cute” and I caught her looking at me a few times which made us laugh. Later that night she told me her brother (my roomate) has put in a good word for me and that he never allows her to talk to his friends like that. She also told me a beach I should visit and if my roommate didn’t come with me she’d met up with me.

Then when we all left i texted her and told her I had a great time hanging out with her and that Id have to visit her sometime soon and she agreed. I also told her I wish she stayed at out place one more night and she said “I know 🙁”

To me this is all a lot of flirting and I think shes interested in getting to know me. Am I wrong? I have texted her since this weekend with responces from her but nothing really juicey. My roommate also doesn’t know if shes is into me and i know he would tell me if he knew..i told him not to find out for me that I would find out myself.

What should I do? there is a little bit of distance between us but I am crushing really good on this girl.

[AskApril Masini]

Ask her out on a date! 🙂

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[kiterider123]

I plan on it.

I have texted her today and asked her a question….she responded and asked me how work was. I responded and asked her about her day with no response at all. I hate reading into texts…but how bad of a sign is this?

also how do i ask her on a date?

[AskApril Masini]

How old are you?

[kiterider123]

we are 25 (me) 26 (her)

[AskApril Masini]

Thanks! 🙂

Given your ages, a nice date would be dinner, a movie, both or a picnic, going to the beach and surfing, taking a hike and then grabbing lunch — just call her up and invite her to do one of these things (or something you come up with on your own), and when you do ask, specify a Saturday night at 8 — or some other specific time and date. If that doesn’t work, agree on a time and date, and before you hang up, tell her you’ll pick her up, and be sure to get her address. When you show up for the date, bring her flowers, or a single flower, or a little gift to show her that she’s really someone special to you. 😉

Hope that works! If things go really well, you can buy and check out a book I wrote called [b]Ideas for a Fun Date[/b] [url]https://www.askapril.com/relationship-dating-advice/ideas-for-a-fun-date.html[/url].

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[kiterider123]

can i really still do this if she didnt respond to the last two times i texted her? i feel like thats a sign ….

[AskApril Masini]

Yes!

If she says yes, then she’s interested in dating you. If she says no, then she’s not and you can move on.

[b]Everyone likes to be liked! If the advice you found on AskApril.com was helpful “like” us on FB — and tell a friend!
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[kiterider123]

I got my answer. She said she is kinda intrested but being 4 hrs away and she just lost her job she is too stressed to date. Thats ok i respect that. But i cant stop thinking about her. I know the situation is a no go…but talking with my roomate last night her brother he assured me about her and said if she gets a new job closer to where i live i should persue it then. Im trying to live on the right now but keep thinking on the what if and what can i do to shpw her im worth it which is a waste of time and unhealthy. I am very intrested in getting to know her beyond romatically but giess thats hard to do right now

[AskApril Masini]

Let me know if you have a question for me! 😀

[b]Everyone likes to be liked! If the advice you found on AskApril.com was helpful “like” us on FB — and tell a friend!
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[Ethan Morales]

She flirted hard, and you read that right. Compliments, lingering looks, her brother putting in a good word those are not accidental signals. The long drive and her job loss are real obstacles, not excuses, and they change the timeline and the emotional bandwidth she has to invest. Attractions are there; logistics and timing are the problem.

A single delayed or missing text is not a death sentence context is. One-off slow replies happen when someone’s stressed or overwhelmed; repeated disappearances are the pattern that matters. If she’s ghosting more than engaging, that’s a sign she’s low-priority right now. If she’s still initiating occasional flirty contact and remembering personal stuff, she hasn’t closed the door she’s just not available to walk through it yet.

Your roommate’s support is useful only insofar as it confirms she’s not offended by you. Don’t turn him into your emotional translator or your plan B. Respect her “I’m stressed/too far” boundary: tell her you understand and that you want to keep getting to know her in a low-pressure way. Offer connection, not demands a call every now and then, text check-ins, and the honest line that you’d be interested if/when she’s closer or less stressed.

Say it clearly and keep your dignity. Something like: “I really enjoyed the weekend I like you and I’d love to see where this could go. I get that you’re stressed and far away; if you ever move closer or want to hang out when you’re up for it, I’m down. No pressure I just want you to know where I stand.” Then live your life: keep lines open, don’t obsess over the what-ifs, and let her decide if she can match your interest when circumstances change.

[Tara]

She practically handed you her interest on a silver platter, and you’re still standing there poking it like it’s a trap. She flirted, complimented you, stared at you, talked about you to her mother, made plans, hinted she wanted more time with you, and you’re pretending you need a committee to verify it.

Your “nothing juicy in the texts” complaint is pathetic. She gave you the opening. You’re the one too timid to walk through it. Interest doesn’t survive endless hesitation. You’re killing momentum because you’re waiting for her to chase you, and she won’t.

And dragging your roommate into this as a barometer? Weak. He’s not your psychic, and you’re using him as a shield so you don’t have to risk a real move.
Here’s what you actually need to do: stop acting like a nervous intern asking for permission. Pick a time, pick a place, and tell her you’re taking her out. Not “sometime.” Not “maybe.” A date. A plan. A sentence that doesn’t drip insecurity.

“Saturday. 7 pm. Drinks. I’ll pick you up.”
If she says yes, good. If she doesn’t, at least you stop embarrassing yourself with this overthinking spiral.

[Sally]

When a girl comes on strong in person and then goes soft over text, it messes with your head. But honestly? From what you wrote, she likes you. That wasn’t polite flirting that was real interest. Girls don’t call you cute to your face over and over unless they mean it.

The quiet texting doesn’t mean she changed her mind. Some people are just better in person. Some get shy. Some don’t want to look too eager when the weekend energy fades.

If you want to know, keep it simple. Ask her to hang out not a big plan, just something small. You’ll know everything from how she responds.
Don’t make your roommate the middleman. Just keep being the guy she already liked at the lake house. Let it unfold.

[Natalie Noah]

He genuinely likes his roommate’s sister and has picked up on a lot of signs that she is interested in him as well compliments, flirtation, repeated attention, and playful interactions all point to that. He also seems very conscientious about boundaries, respecting the distance and her personal circumstances, which shows emotional maturity. It’s obvious that he wants to pursue a romantic connection but is cautious about not overstepping, especially since she is currently stressed and living far away.

The challenge here is the practical limitations: the long distance, her recent job loss, and her current stress levels. While she’s expressed some interest, her situation makes it clear that a relationship can’t realistically start right now. Yours struggle with “what if” thoughts and trying to figure out ways to show her he’s worth it is natural, but as he himself recognized, it can be unhealthy. Right now, the healthiest thing for him is to focus on the present maintaining friendly communication without putting pressure on her or himself. Keeping the connection light and supportive, rather than romantic, will prevent disappointment and allow him to enjoy the interactions they can realistically have.

There is hope for the future if circumstances change. Her brother’s comment about pursuing her if she moves closer and stabilizes her situation gives him a roadmap for later, but it shouldn’t stop him from living fully in the present. He can continue to be friendly, respectful, and genuinely interested in her as a person, while also investing in his own life, friendships, and goals. When or if the timing aligns, he’ll be ready to pursue a romantic connection, but for now, patience and emotional self-care are key.

[Member]

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