- This topic has 3 replies, 3 voices, and was last updated 15 years, 2 months ago by
April Masini, your AskApril.
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December 21, 2010 at 1:01 pm #3550
Anonymous
InactiveHi April,
So he wasn’t talking for me for sometime because he was having issues. Yet he never told me so. So I gave him space. But I was hurt that he just left without letting me know. Then e started getting close to me again but I was too hurt and I needed space so I kind of kept away. But now I have started responding to him and opening up more. He seems to be caring too, because he initiates conversation etc, if he wasn’t interested would he do that? …But the next moment he goes all quiet and has this look in his face like not giving me much attention sort of. I gather that may be he is annoyed with him that I had to keep him wait for this long…and I didn’t accept him immediately when he returned.
So I want to ask him if things are alright between us and why is he acting like he doesn’t want to tolerate me much. But I can’ just ask him it just like that…because I know guys don’t like to communicate about the problems they have…so what would be a better way for me to approach this subject?
December 22, 2010 at 9:45 pm #17029
April Masini, your AskAprilKeymasterYou can talk to him without having “the relationship talk” which is never a good idea. It sounds like he is interested in you, but that he may be having problems in his personal life that have nothing to do with you, but that are affecting his moods and you’re misconstruing them as relationship issues. Ask him how things are going at work and with his family. You don’t have to give him the idea that he’s doing something wrong. Instead, tell him you’re interested in him and want to know how he’s doing in the rest of his life. Men love to talk about themselves, and being a good listener, and one who is non-judgmental, may be just what this relationship needs to get back on track. You should also buy and read, Think & Date Like A Man, a book I wrote for women who need tips and advice in dating. You can get the book on the websites for Amazon and Barnes & Noble or right here!
[url]https://www.askapril.com/relationship-dating-advice/think-and-date-like-a-man.html [/url] I hope to see you @AskAprilcom on Twitter and on Facebook at this link:
.[url][/url] December 23, 2010 at 5:44 am #16489Anonymous
Member #382,293Hey April.
Thanks for your advice. Today he actually asked me what was bothering me. But April I just couldn’t put my thoughts into words. I just got stuck and hesitated. I told him that I will tell him about it later. I don’t know what gotten to me. But I can say that I am really hurt…still hurt that he should come around like this as if noting happened.December 23, 2010 at 12:30 pm #17480
April Masini, your AskAprilKeymasterYou need to learn to articulate your thoughts if you want to be successful in relationships. If you don’t, you’re doomed to a series of miscommunications that can torpedo relationships. 🙁 This process takes discipline and practice and you’ll make mistakes along the way but if you don’t try it, you’ll never succeed.In addition to which if you continue to live in the past and refuse to let go of the small stuff, you’re going to doom your relationships, too — and I know you don’t want that.
This guy likes you and he’s interested in you. Accept that (at least) half of the miscommunication was your responsibility and fault and move on.
My advice is to not make a big deal of things and instead,
[i]appreciate[/i] his interest in your feelings. Use this opportunity to not just grow closer, but to have some fun. If your entire relationship is based on problems it’s not going to be healthy. You can tell him you were missing him, but you’re really appreciative of his taking the time to find out what’s going on with you.You really should buy Think & Date Like A Man at this link:
. It’s $15.95 and downloads automatically. I’m happy to give free advice to you — but I think it’s time for you to read this book and invest in your relationship/s and yourself now! So read it and then let’s “talk” here some more![url]https://www.askapril.com/relationship-dating-advice/think-and-date-like-a-man.html [/url] 😀 See you as well @AskAprilcom on Twitter (please follow me there for highlights of Ask April) and on Facebook at this link:
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