[Lovexo]

Me and my now ex bf had been dating for 1 year and 3 months but broke up back this past October in 2015. I was honestly devastated but I still have hope something can happened. He is 19 and I am 18. I truly enjoy his company by being with him. Not just that way, I enjoy having him in my life in general. To me, i personally feel like I can be myself around him, in a way I never have been able to be with another guy. He makes me laugh a lot when we are together. A lot of the things like the cute nick names and kisses and planning events that we use to do when we were together, are some of the things that have stayed the same even though we broke up. I still love him and want to be with him. We are friends and see each other. We still sleep with each other even though are broken up. I asked him if we could get back together in the future and all he says is “who knows.” We had graduated high school together and had made so many plans for the future. We currently go to the same college. Personally to me, doing it still has a meaning because I love him. I don’t know about him. What should I do in this situation? I don’t want to be used but don’t know how to tell him either. Is it bad? Please help!!

[April Masini, your AskApril]

If you’re not dating him, then stop sleeping with him. You’re just confusing yourself by trying to convince yourself that the sex means more than it does. He’s ready and you’re willing — and he doesn’t see a future with you. I’m sorry to be so blunt, but I think you need to get a grip on what’s actually happening, not what did happen, or what you want to have happened. I know you want to get back together, but keeping yourself in the friend zone and the friends with benefits zone, is just prolonging the inevitable. I think it’s time for you accept the break up and start acting broken up so you can get healthy and happy again.

I hope that helps. I know this is difficult for you, but it will get easier once you commit to moving on, let go of him and the relationship you shared, and start acting single. That’s also the best way to be available to meet someone new! 😉

Let me know if you have any other questions.

[Lovexo]

I know you’re right, everyone has told me that I need to move on but I wanted to get advice outside of the regular people that I ask.
I just have two more questions.
First, how should I tell him that we need to stop sleeping together?
Two, would you recommend still talking to him as friends or cut off all ties ?

[April Masini, your AskApril]

[quote]First, how should I tell him that we need to stop sleeping together?[/quote]

You can say, “I’m no longer going to be sleeping with you.” Or you can just say “Sorry, not interested,” when he asks. Or just don’t go over to his place, or invite him to yours. Simple! 🙂

[quote]Two, would you recommend still talking to him as friends or cut off all ties ?[/quote]

He’s not your friend. He’s your ex-boyfriend. Move on, and don’t spend any more time with him. Be polite. Be civil. But don’t be friendly or hang out with him. It’s going to make it more difficult on yourself if you do.

I know this seems difficult, but it’s really going to make your life a lot better in the long run. 😉

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