[thiswomps352]

Alright, here goes.
I recently turned 18, so my brother and his friends took me to a strip club.
I am a virgin and a soft guy, and I have never been in a relationship (my high school is far from my house, and a car was never available due to relatives having to work, so how could have I been in a relationship?)

I have to say that the strip club experience was amazing.
My brother kept asking me to pick the hottest girl so he can buy me a lap dance (most of these girls could have passed for magazine models in my opinion), so he kept calling over girls doing the “it’s his birthday” thing, and making it socially awkward for me, since I’m shy 😀
But then the next set of girls came on stage, and I saw the most beautiful girl I have ever seen!
She looked young, and I did the whole put the money on the counter thing so she can come over. So she comes over and starts doing some moves. She says it’s her first time at this club. I go to put money in her bra, and she makes a comment on how small her boobs are (all in good humor though, and I don’t care about small boobs).

After the next set of girls was on the stage, my brother told me to pick a girl soon, so I mustered up enough courage to ask him for that girl specifically. So he found her and paid for a lap dance.
So we go to the private stalls, and she goes into one she likes, saying it makes her look tan (heck, she would look amazing in any light). Then she starts.
I was nervous, very nervous. She was down on my level with the whole experience though. She mentions that I don’t look 18, that I could pass to be in my 20’s.
She makes a comment that she is 20 years old, and that she isn’t much older than me.
She makes a comment somewhere around the lines of: “so your a virgin?”
I reply with “Is it that obvious?”
She smiled and said kind of. She told me how in high school, she took like 5 guys virginities, and how it “wasn’t that hard, you just stick it in” (excuse the thread if it’s getting too ‘adult’).
She mentions that I am her first lap dance of the night.
She made the comment about her small boobs like two times during the session. Honestly, they were the most amazing boobs I have ever seen(and the first boobs I felt with my hands, as some girls gave my face the experience first, while I was near the poles 😎 ) (I might be a small boob guy??? 😆 )
She noticed my hands were shaking, and made a comment: “Are your hands shaking?” I replied with: “A little,”
Then the song ended, and she slowly stopped and replied with” “that’s it,”
It felt like it only lasted 30 seconds…
I stood up, and she told me that I could sit down. So she started to get dressed.
While she was getting dressed, she asked me a few questions, like: do I have a girlfriend (I tried to reply with no, and tried to explain why — because of the whole school being far away thing — I don’t remember what i said, but I bet it didn’t come out how I wanted 😆 .
She asked me if I play football, I said no, but I weight lift. (I’m chubby, but have been weightlifting on my own time for more than a year now, and I believe I am pretty buff 😎 )
I don’t know how my replies came out as I was still recovering from the lap dance, so I was in a weird state. Memory was hazy after that, and I don’t believe we said anything else while we walked out.

Now… I know adult entertainers are very good at making you feel special.
I’m just wondering if I should track this girl down to ask her on a date?
The club has a website that offers online chat, so if there was any way to get to her, it would be through that.
I’m wondering if I am taking the whole experience the wrong way — maybe it was just my virgin brain that won’t let go of her?
There were many more girls that night, and my brother even bought me another lap dance with a different girl (this girl was a lot nicer, but in a completely different way), but the main thing I keep remembering is that one girl.
Now, I DON’T want to be one of those creepy guys (does me liking a stripper make me creepy?), so I am afraid that if I ever get in contact with her, she will think of me like that. (With all the guys that she sees everyday, I bet she has had experience with a creep here and there).
I don’t want to ask her out to ‘get some’, I want to ask her out because she is honestly really beautiful, and I would like to get to know her.
I honestly don’t care that she is a stripper. If there was anything that came out of the whole club experience is that I have gained much respect for these girls, because what they do everyday is amazing.

I have liked a girl before — in high school. I asked for her number once, she was nervous, and declined.
We were friends, but that kind of broke it, then she started going out with this one guy later on. She had her sights set on someone else already, so now that I look back at it, it was probably awkward for both of us when I asked for her number 😆

I don’t know if she has a boyfriend or not.
Should I go for it because life is too short?
Or, should I forget about it because I’m too afraid of what she might think of me for contacting her?

She works a good 20-30 minutes away from where I live, but I have a car now 😎

So recap:
Saw beautiful stripper,
Have been thinking of her since (been only a few days since experience)

I have lost appetite, and all the usual things (video games and such) don’t seem as fun now. I haven’t even looked at porn since! (that used to be a daily routine).
I don’t know if that is because of her, or the experience as a whole.
Maybe this is a result of the experience, it threw me off-balance and made me realize that there is much more to life than video games, and porn, and that is — girls. 😉

[April Masini, your AskApril]

I understand why you like her, but I don’t recommend you pursue her as a girlfriend. If you start to get involved with her you’re going to be very upset that she’s stripping and doing lap dances for different men each night she works. Instead, why don’t you try and use her as inspiration to find someone to date who isn’t a stripper? You’ll find you have a lot more in common with someone who has a job that isn’t so “personal”. 😉

I hope that helps.

Please follow me @AskAprilcom on Twitter and on Facebook at this link: [url][/url].

[thiswomps352]

Thanks for your reply!

I fully understand what you mean when you say her line of work isn’t relationship-friendly.
I thought hard about the whole stripper thing. I understand well what she does,[u] but under that image, she IS a woman[/u] (and she isn’t nearly as crazy as the other strippers 😆 ).
I believe there is a well established boundary between what she does and what she feels in her line of work.
The only thing that has kept me wanting to pursue her is the thought that she might have actually liked ME (while putting into consideration that it’s her job to make me feel special) 😕

The questions she asked definitely get to a guy like me.
What do I take out of being asked if I have a girlfriend, or do I play football?
Damn, I wish I could read minds…

All I have been doing since then has been laying down, in thought — “what if?” or “should I?” or “I am thinking too hard about this!”. — Then the cycle begins again… 😐

Many times I have thought to let this one pass — and then that is counter-acted by: “I should at least TRY and see what happens,”.

^^^That above statement is what gets me!

What’s going on in my mind is a cool movie scene, where the guy tries so hard to find this girl he likes, but in reality — I bet it would be taken as some creepy guy who needs to get a life. 😆

AAAARRRGHH, I don’t even know what’s what anymore.
I’m trying to study to be an ACSM certified personal trainer — and there is a tremendous amount of terms.
So it’s like: Pharynx; larynx; trachea; *BAM* That girl; blank mind; reread section.
I studied for two hours yesterday, and barely got past two small sections.

Though I have absolutely no idea what position she is in, in her personal life, may you put yourself in her position and tell me how YOU would react if I was to ask you out?
Unless you still recommend not going after a stripper (which I fully understand, but in my current position, I couldn’t care less 😆 ).
It feels good to get this out of my system, and even better that someone was there to read it and give their opinion.
Thank you. 😀

[matt2011]

[quote]Though I have absolutely no idea what position she is in, in her personal life, may you put yourself in her position and tell me how YOU would react if I was to ask you out?[/quote]

A good friend of mine has been employed as a stripper for over a year now. Given that…

You don’t have a shot. If she were actually interested in you, she’d have given you her number, or at least asked for yours*. She was making you feel special. It’s her job, and she’s good at it. She was saying (and doing) what she had to to make you like her. That’s how she makes money. That’s how she gets people to come back and see her (again, and again).

She gets asked out by clients all the time. You asking her out won’t even phase her, even if she acts like it does. If you decide that you’ve got to try, it’s pretty much going to end one of two ways:
1) She’ll find a way to decline without saying as much, and encourage you to “visit” her at the club sometime.
2) She’ll accept, assuming that you’re going to spend a bunch of money on her. I’d say this is fairly unlikely given that she knows you don’t have a boatload of money to spend on her.

Note(*): Even giving you her number or getting yours (and her actually calling) doesn’t necessarily mean anything. Many girls have two phones. One for clients, and one for everyone else.

Long story short, why not find someone you’re a bit more compatible with (and that you’ve actually got a chance with)?

[thiswomps352]

Hey Matt,

I thought about it some more after I posted my last reply.
I did decide in the end that I would let it go (I guess I just had to get it out of my system 🙂 )
Though I did have my sights set on her, I guess I’ll just have to settle for another of only 3,301,112,087 women in the world… 😆

I came back to reply my decision, and you do put up a very good point!
I didn’t know a single thing about what goes on in the background of that career.
Hey, maybe I’ll ask one of the girls out at my gym 💡

Thanks Matt,
and thanks April
For your replies
😀

[April Masini, your AskApril]

You’re welcome! 😉

[oonadesade]

Yes, it’s true it is a strippers job to charm one and encourage them to come back to spend more money.
However, if she does have an interest in you personally, she might agree to meet you for an outside of work activity. Such as: going for coffee, seeing a movie, taking a walk around the block, having a simple conversation over a quick cigarette…
If that does happen, which of course is, as already stated, unlikely, there is no harm ever in giving it one shot. Just try. That’s all any of us do, putting ourselves out there and hoping. It’s never ever easy, but do no assume, due to her job, that there is no possibility in a relationship ever forming.
Don’t go there all the time and get private lap dances though…that is kind of creepy ^_^

[April Masini, your AskApril]

Happy New Year! Let me know how things are going for you. 😉

[Member]

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