[desi123]

My BF and I began dating in October. When I met him, he was unemployed due to the poor economy. Since I needed help at work, I spoke to my employers and he was hired. About two months ago, he moved in with my daughter and myself. I was used to paying for everything when we first met because he was unemployed and he needed the little bit of money he got from unemployment to live. Now that he is working, I expected things to change a little bit. Things like lunch for example… He pays sometimes and I pay sometimes. The difference here is he eats more than I do and his food costs almost twice what mine does. I have gone from a $6.00 a day lunch to a $15.00 to $20.00 a day lunch. I am on a tight budget. I can’t afford that! I am a single mom! Then comes the moving in agreement… I will continue to pay all of my bills. He pays his bills. I will pay all of the household bills and groceries. He will put $500 a month in a joint savings account to be used for emergencies and small vacations. Well, none of this has happened yet. I have gotten nothing since he has moved in. He is a slob. I clean the house, he makes a huge mess. He leaves the doors or windows open while having the heater or AC on full blast because he needs “fresh air”. My daughter and I are freezing to death but hey man as long as you are happy. Pffttt! The electric bill was $350.00 last month. The grocery bill last week was $230.00. He wants to drive my car instead of his because mine is “sexier”. But he won’t put gas in it.
So today I approach him with the “I pay for my lunch, you pay for yours”. What’s wrong with dutch? He became very moody and made some smart remarks. Finally I told him that I am getting tapped out by all the extras that I am having to pay for now and I have to stop. After some awkward silence, he tells me that he does not want to argue about money and that he feels like I think he is taking advantage of me. His words, not mine. I have a distinct feeling he is repeating what another girl from his past has told him.
Did I make a mistake? Is he a mooch? Am I being taken advantage of? Should I kick him to the curb?

[April Masini, your AskApril]

[quote]Did I make a mistake? Is he a mooch? Am I being taken advantage of? Should I kick him to the curb?[/quote]

Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes.

I hope that helps! And you need to learn to say, “No.” It’s going to help you a lot. 😉

Let me know how things go, and please follow me @AskAprilcom on Twitter and on Facebook at this link: [url][/url]. 😀

[desi123]

Thanks April! Sometimes you just need to get an opinion from someone who isn’t involved! I do need to learn how to say no.

[April Masini, your AskApril]

You’re very welcome. 😀

[Member]

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