[Anonymous]

Me and my boyfriend have been going out on and off for 7 months well yesterday me and my boyfriend were supposed to spend the day together just the two of us , and well when he picked me up his friend was in the car. It’s not that I do not like his friend it’s just that my boyfriend acts mean with his friend around.Well as soon as i got in the car he asked me to get one of my friends to come hangout with his friend well i was looking through my phone and he said if you can’t find him a girl i’m just going to take you home. then he apologized to his friend and said he didn’t care if he took me home.Well then I found a friend for his friend and everything was going good we were all hanging out until we stopped to get something to eat and when we were heading back to the car i tried to open the door but my boyfriend locked it before I could and then his friend came around and said he wants me to sit in the front with him.So i got in the back with my friend. Then after we had dropped my friend and his friend off I tried to talk to him about how I was feeling and he just said i’m sorry baby i love you but then he kept acting weird so i said maybe we should breakup and then i tried to hug him and he put his lighter to my arm and burnt me and then grabbed my arm and bit me really hard he left his teeth marks. he said don’t touch me you want to break up and i said I don’t and he said the only way he could forgive me is if i gave him a blow*job and he shoved my head down there . My boyfriend is really jealous he always wants to make sure we talk all day if we don’t see each other he is always threatening to not talk to me for awhile if I make him mad. So is my boyfriend abusive? should I try to work things out? I just don’t know what to do.

[Anonymous]

You should definitely leave him, and in an authoritative way. Call him and let him know it’s over. Do not hesitate by saying things like, “We need to talk.” Let him know you’re tired of the way he treats you and it’s over. No matter what he says, do not budge. Leave him with no question of getting back together. He may say he’ll change, but that’s most likely a lie. I can almost guarantee if you do not take action now, it will get worse. He needs to sort his own problems out on his own. Not take it out on his “girlfriend” who he treats like a sex slave. I hope you will not let this guy continue to run your life and abuse you.

[April Masini, your AskApril]

Yes, you’re boyfriend is abusive, and you should report the incident where he burned you and bit you and then tried to force you to perform oral sex on him, to the police. What he did is not just abusive, it’s illegal.

You need to stop seeing him immediately and start to really take care of yourself. It’s of concern that you’re not sure that someone burning you with a cigarette lighter is abusive or not. Most people would see very clearly that it is. 🙁

The other things he did were disrespectful, rude and not what anyone should put up with in a boyfriend, but the physical violence is a big, flashing red light that you’re not with a man who wants to love you — you’re with someone who wants to hurt you.

I hope that helps. Let me know how things go — and stay safe!

I’ll see you @AskAprilcom on Twitter and on Facebook at this link: [url][/url].

[Member]

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