[Anonymous]

I have been with my boyfriend for over two years. He has never really done anything to disobey my trust, but I have serious trust issues with him going out with his friends to bars. Mostly if not all of his friends are single and are always on the prowl for girls, and my boyfriend is often looked upon and used as a “wingman”. Although he has never “done” anything while doing this, I find it is very inappropriate for someone in a serious relationship to be doing this. The whole scene is very bad. Drunk girls, parties, drinking and single friends looking to hook up. Am I overreacting or should I give him the ultimatum to quit this lifestyle or quit our relationship until he has matured enough?

[April Masini, your AskApril]

You’re not overreacting, but you shouldn’t give him an ultimatum.

In Think & Date Like A Man, [url]https://www.askapril.com/relationship-dating-advice/think-and-date-like-a-man.html[/url], one of the things I tell women is that if you want to know if your guy is ready for a commitment you’ll notice that he starts acting like it. Guys who are ready to commit stop hanging out with their single friends and going to singles places, and instead begin hanging out with other guys who are coupled and hanging out at places that are not singles places. Your guy isn’t ready for a commitment.

Instead of giving him an ultimatum, like a mother would a child, understand and accept that he’s not ready for the same thing you are, and move on. I get too many posts from women who think they can turn someone into someone they’re not. If he’s not ready, he’s not ready. You can’t make him be ready. Find someone who is. Read Think & Date Like A Man — it will help you a lot! [url][/url].

[Member]

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