[Pretty Raizhel]

I’ve been with my husband for about 4 years. And something happened last week that keeps bothering me and I’m not sure if it’s considered cheating. He was texting his colleague more often and some of the messages are flirty. Nothing physical but the tone and frequency of the messages made me feel uncomfortable. I don’t want to overreact but I also don’t want to ignore boundaries that are important in a relationship. I can feel that he really enjoys texting with his workmate more than with me. Is this considered cheating? I’m 36 and he’s 39.

[Nabiha]

I think when a husband starts getting more comfort from seeing his colleague’s notifications than from his wife, then understand that a virus has entered the system. It doesn’t have to be physical; just a mental wander is enough.
The new “spark” that a husband is getting at this age is actually a cheap way to escape the office boredom. He is becoming cool with his colleague because there are no responsibilities or home problems, and this is the biggest red flag. If he is ignoring you and is glued to his phone, then he is not being friendly but is trying to fill the emptiness of his married life from outside.

Is this chatting? Maybe not “full blown” yet, but definitely “micro chatting”. If a husband is feeling flirtatious outside after 4 years of marriage, then it means that he is not respecting the boundaries of the marriage. you are being “uncomfortable” is enough proof that something is wrong.

[Marco]

Are you going to wait until something physical happens?
If there’s already flirting involved, that means something is wrong. You should start feeling concerned now. Talk to your husband because it is not normal for a married person to be flirting with someone else. It’s better to fix this now before it gets worse.
Also, think about whether there is something you might be lacking, which could be why your husband is feeling the need to flirt with someone else.

[Member]

Posts