[Anonymous]

Met a guy on a online singles site, we have not met in person yet but we talk and text all the time. We are planning a in person meeting in a couple of weeks. Here’s my issue, the chemistry we have over the phone is amazing!! So much so that I would want to give in on that first meeting! But I WON’T!!! I feel as if he is a guy worth having, but our phone conversations have been so stimulating how do I not seem like a tease but genuinely interested but want to wait until there is more substance there? Also any advice on how to arrange the first meeting we live in different states he is willing to come to me or do whatever makes me most comfortable?

[Ask April Masini]

You’re not going to like my suggestion, so buckle up.

Your conversations online and by text have focused on sex and not on finding out if he’s right for you and vice versa. Coupled with the long distance, out of state nature of your geography, and any first date involving someone sleeping over in a hotel, this is not a good situation for a relationship for you. If you’re just looking for sex, then call this what it is: a hook up. But if you want a relationship, choose someone in your own area code or zip code. In addition, you SHOULD NOT be arranging the first date. That’s what he needs to do, and the fact that he hasn’t is more proof that this is just a hook up.

So my advice in a nutshell is forget this guy and start fresh looking for someone appropriate and nearby.

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