[Mike]

Ok I’m married2 years. My wife is great. We do everything together. She never even hangs out what her friends. Ok this my problem. Months ago I notice she never wore her ring to work and we argued about it. After she started wearing her wedding ring all the time. One night she comes home no ring. We argued and she told me she takes it off while she’s moving patients. She’s a CNA. I told her I felt like its respectful to wear it especially you work around guys. So recently she’s been wearing her engagement and wedding ring. I like that. Tonight she comes home and where hugging and I said where’s your ring. Her reply I took it off in my break. So her answer bothered me. I said we’ll why didn’t put it back on. She then says I take it off all the time she said the reason why was she has to keep putting lotion on her hands. I told you been coming home every night without your ring and been lying to me when really not wearing it while at work. I don’t know what to think of this I feel like its a poor excuse on her part I feel like she lied to me and I feel disrespected. We argued and she’s mad at me. But I’m hurt. Any advice. Am I over reacting

[Mike]

[quote=”Mike”]Ok I’m married2 years. My wife is great. We do everything together. She never even hangs out what her friends. Ok this my problem. Months ago I notice she never wore her ring to work and we argued about it. After she started wearing her wedding ring all the time. One night she comes home no ring. We argued and she told me she takes it off while she’s moving patients. She’s a CNA. I told her I felt like its respectful to wear it especially you work around guys. So recently she’s been wearing her engagement and wedding ring. I like that. Tonight she comes home and where hugging and I said where’s your ring. Her reply I took it off in my break. So her answer bothered me. I said we’ll why didn’t put it back on. She then says I take it off all the time she said the reason why was she has to keep putting lotion on her hands. I told you been coming home every night without your ring and been lying to me when really not wearing it while at work. I don’t know what to think of this I feel like its a poor excuse on her part I feel like she lied to me and I feel disrespected. We argued and she’s mad at me. But I’m hurt. Any advice. Am I over reacting[/quote]

[April Masini, your AskApril]

Sometimes people fight about who didn’t take out the garbage — and the fight isn’t really about the garbage at all. In fact, it seems like there’s more than you’re writing here. If a relationship is really good and strong, whether or not someone wears a ring (whether it’s the man or the woman) is not a deal breaker, but it sounds like you’re having feelings of mistrust here that go beyond any issues of respect. Or, it sounds like you’re angry about something else, and this ring is a place for you to put your anger at her without telling her what’s really going on.

So, is there something else brewing beneath the surface? Or is this really just about a ring?

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