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April Masini, your AskApril.
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September 22, 2010 at 2:21 pm #3127
ToriB
Member #20,692I am 19 years old and currently dating a 46 year old. ( yes big difference in age) I have fallen madly in love with him and think about him all the time.He says he believes he loves me as well. He is always working (mostly works from home or at work, hes a professor) and has a son which I have yet to meet because it seems to be better that way. Im not 100% sure he feels the same way though.. I see him everytime he doesnt have his son. But the thing is, is that he has accounts on dating websites that are still up and says its nothing but he logs on them alot. I found him on one of the websites and confronted him about it telling him if hes not serious about me let me know. He said I was over reacting and if he wanted to cheat on me he would tell me. Im just so worried things wont work out. But I want them to! Am I really just over reacting? September 22, 2010 at 11:28 pm #15845
April Masini, your AskAprilKeymasterHow long have you two been dating? September 25, 2010 at 3:06 pm #16201Anonymous
Member #382,293weve been dating for 6 months now September 26, 2010 at 2:20 am #15929BethanyAnn
Member #20,643[size=150]Honestly, I believe that it is too large of an age difference at least at your age. He is old enough to be your father, and as for the dating websites I will admit I have tried them and yes my accounts are still up only because I don’t know how to close them and forgot my login information, but since you said he accesses his quite frequently we know that isn’t the case. He may just want to be keeping his options open, because although to a 19 year old six months may seem like a long time to a 46 year old I highly doubt that they see it as that long. Now I’m not saying that he isn’t serious, it could be any number of reasons such as he met someone on one of the sites that he just enjoys talking to but doesn’t want to share personal information like his email address with. As for you not meeting his son yet, he is TWENTY-SEVEN years older than you, meaning more than likely his son is really close to your age, which would be awkward for most people and let me guess he hasn’t met your parents or any family members for that matter? How can you justify him not introducing his son to you if you haven’t introduced him to your parents? One more hunch you met your boyfriend while attending college where he taught? Sorry if I seem a bit cruel in this, but I do not approve of age differences like this, because to me it seems too close to child molestation or statutory rape.[/size] September 26, 2010 at 12:29 pm #15585Anonymous
Member #382,293Actually my parents have met him at a dinner we put together. They know how old he is and no. We did not meet threw school. He is from a totally prestigious university and I am attending another. If that was the case id never take the option of dating a professor from my school. It could ruin his career and get both of us in serious trouble. Vise verse for his family as well. Ive met his family members and they know how old I am and theyre very understanding and happy for us. His son on the other hand is younger than me hes 8. He hasnt introduced me to him because the psychiatrist suggested that he shouldnt introduce any of his partners to him until a year later so incase things dont go right he hasnt grown attached to me and wont be upset if I stop showing up. Which I am 100% okay with because I really wouldnt want my dad bringing home another woman with the hope of maybe my parents getting back together. Also, he has never forced me to do anything I dont want to do. We havent done anything sexual if thats what your thinking. September 26, 2010 at 8:26 pm #15903
April Masini, your AskAprilKeymasterYour boyfriend isn’t introducing you to his son because he’s not serious about you yet. The only good reason to introduce a girlfriend to the child is because she may be in his life long term. He doesn’t feel that way about you right now. The same is true of his keeping dating site profiles up. He’s not as committed to you and your relationship as you are. I know you want him to tell you straight up if he’s interested in other women and have asked him to do so, but he’s not going to. His actions speak louder than words. He’s just not on the same page you are right now.
I hope that helps. Let me know how things go. And join me on Facebook. Here’s that link:
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