[ace12]

Hi April I am looking forward to hearing what you have to say.

So to start off I just want to give you as much info as I can. I am 25 years old male, Russian living in Moscow, and for the past 20 years I’ve lived in the US. I’ve been in Moscow since April of 2014 and it was just 3, almost 4 weeks ago that I met somebody incredible. Now I am normal guy, but striving for success. I work out, dress well, have some insecurities of my own, but I don’t dwell on them. I am big on self improvement etc. so what I am trying to say is that I don’t sit on the couch all day. I am emotionally connected with myself and believe I would be a great catch, but of course lots of areas that I am still working on improving.

So I meet this girl in a top Russian club where Ferrari’s and Lamborghini’s are frequently parked outside. It’s high class and I am out with friends. We have a table and I invited a girl over, she asks if it’s okay to invite her friends and I say yes. She brings over two friends and I make eye contact with one. Sit next to her and we end up kissing, dancing, and cuddling. She tells me to take her phone number down. She leaves.

Next day, she texts me asking how I am. She told me that she was really happy to have met me. I talk to her for a bit and then ask her about dinner later (which she hinted at the night before). She said yes and I ended up giving her roses which she loved. She told me at dinner that no man was as gallant as I was. We were cuddling both in the cab both to and from the restaurant. When I met up with her on the way to dinner she asked me if I would marry her. I said yes and I was direct. She is a model and about 6 feet tall and beautiful. She wore no bra with her dress and she was just stunning period. I felt so comfortable around her and at ease with her I had thought that she was the one. She is everything that I have ever wanted in a woman. We kissed at many points throughout the date. During dinner we were laughing and smiling and staring into each others eyes. She held my hand at dinner and were like two lovers infatuated with each other. I was stunned by her and I was staring, she asked me why I was looking at her like that and I told her I loved her. She had asked me if I liked kids and I said yes. She was comfortable talking about her family and I was as well. Great dinner and we really enjoyed the romantic atmosphere. Everything was quite perfect. She was even sweet enough to pour my cup of tea as we were talking. She really knew how to show that she wanted to take care of me. She had hinted that we go to a museum as it was an activity that we would probably both enjoy. There was some confusion about which day, but I told her we should do it on Sunday (it was Friday evening). During the date she told me that if it wasn’t for me she wouldn’t have gone out.

Anyway, later on Saturday, the day after our date, I told her via text I was thinking about her. She asked what exactly, and I told her that I didn’t want anyone else, but her. She told me that I should get her, but warned me that her attention must be earned. It was tough to hear her challenge, but I went with it. I asked her about Sunday, but she declined and said she was busy (she most likely is really busy). Anyway, she messaged me a kiss and I asked her about Tuesday because it was my birthday, but she couldn’t commit. She told me she would congratulate me. That Sunday I texted her that I was going crazy without her (which I was). She replied with an emoticon, but my phone couldn’t recognize it so it was a blank message.

When Tuesday came along I heard nothing from her and my heart sank. Was she busy? What happened? No quick message? Nothing.

I called the next Sunday. Nothing.

I called again the next Thursday, nothing, but a text telling me she was busy and would call back. She never called back.

The next week I messaged her again and told her via text that I understood that she was very busy. I told her I was looking forward to hearing her voice again and that I was looking forward to seeing her soon. She messaged me back saying she would call me the next day.

She never called.

Now it’s been almost another week since. I don’t plan to call for 3 weeks now and see if she gets back to me at all. My friends say that she may be seeing someone at the moment. I came to the conclusion that she may have put me on the backburner. She hasn’t flat out rejected me, but she is not responding to my advances either. It’s been pretty painful not hearing from her. I feel like a loser just thinking about it. I get frustrated and, I am ashamed to say it, even angry when I think about it. I laid my heart on the line and was very direct with her, but she just disappeared on me. What should I do? Where did I go wrong? Should I have been distant and not shown my emotional investment in her in the beginning and let her pursue me? I am lost.

BY the way she is an Aeries and I am a Gemini which is supposed to be a really, really good match. It explains why we get a long so well together. There is only a 3 month age difference between us as well. I know this is a very rare connection, because I’ve not had many like this in my life before. I read up that Aeries secretly like to have their partners a bit jealous in the relationship because it proves that she is worth something to her partner if her partner shows some jealousy. She is frustrated if he doesn’t show it. Is she waiting for me to confront her or what? I am lost so please help. She would be worth all this pain I am going through, but I don’t know what to do. I want her and I want to pursue her, but what would be my approach? How can I catch her? How can I beat whoever she is seeing now?

I want to win her because I think she is the one. I can’t let her go. Please help…

[AskApril Masini]

You met a woman in a club and had one date. Now, she’s not responding to your offers to date her. I know that you want this to be more than that, but when someone’s words and behavior don’t match up, you have to count on their behavior.

The problem here is that you didn’t get to know her before committing, emotionally. When a woman asks you, on the first date, if you’ll marry her, she doesn’t take marriage, or your feelings, very seriously. 😕 I know that she was charming and you had a great date, in addition to the night you met her in a club, but that’s one date — it’s not a relationship. Consider that if she proposed marriage to you on a first date, she’s done the same to other men….. while you may be wildly impressed with her, this might just be the way she always acts. 😮

My advice is that you play the field and keep looking for your Ms. Right. You might also want to consider that the first three months of dating someone are used to get to know each other and decide if you want to continue dating. If you both do, then use the second three months to decide if you want to be monogamous. Although you had a great first date, it’s very premature to decide that she’s the one — especially when she’s cut off all communication. 😳

Next!

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