[Soma]

Hello,

I’ve been with my guy for almost a year. The sex is great, and we’ve relocated to my home state. He hates it here, and wants to move. I told him lets save and we’ll go to his home state. He was all for that.

Recently he’s been acting a bit weird, asking me if I was going to my best friends and saying he’s going to take a train home…. without me… Im like WTF….

Anyways this morning he says Im tired of putting you through our situation, our money is tight and we’re struggling a little. I told him I didnt care how our situation was as long as Im with him. He said but I do..

So my question is what the hell is going on? Is he that unhappy with me? Is he serious about leaving?

I thought I was a good girlfriend, doing everything for him, cleaning cooking going to get him things so he can relax and do whatever he wants…

Please help! 🙁

[Ask April Masini]

The problem with being in a relationship is that it takes two people to stay in it, but only one to leave. If, for WHATEVER reason under the sun, he decides he doesn’t want to be with you, there’s nothing you can do about it. I mean, you can ask him what the problem is, and see if it’s fixable, or you can assess whether you’re just not compatible, but if he isn’t sure why he wants out, but knows for sure THAT he wants out, it’s going to be break up time. 🙁

If after a year you haven’t been able to figure out what’s wrong, I think it’s not only time to let go, but you should get and read my book, Think & Date Like A Man, in order to find the guy who won’t leave because he’s THE right one for you — and because you know how to get him and keep him. 😉 You can download the book here: [url]http://www.askapril.com/relationship-dating-advice/think-and-date-like-a-man.html[/url], and start reading tonight.

I know this is remarkably painful for you, but you’re going to be better off if he really doesn’t want you. You deserve Mr. Right, but that means letting go of Mr. Wrong.

I hope this helps, and that you’ll join me on Facebook at this link: [url][/url]. 🙂

[Anonymous]

I thought we were doing awesome. Ya know couples have their flaws and what not. Its just scaring me that he is willing to let go of something that might be good. We both fell madly in love and I gave up everything to be with him. I am emotionally sick, and I really dont know what to do anymore. I dont want to lose him, but I know you’re right if hes going to go hes going to go and there isnt anything I can do about it.

Does it sound like he wants to leave, or is he hinting something else?

[Ask April Masini]

It sounds, from what you’ve written, like he’s looking for an out to the commitment. 🙁 All you can do is ask him what’s going on and hope that he’s in touch with his own feelings enough to know and then to be able to tell you. When one person wants out they’re either upfront with you or they’re not, and if they’re not, they can be passive aggressive, overly nice, distant, mysterious — there are lots of ways people leave their lovers.

I’m very sorry that you’re so upset — it’s entirely understandable. While you’re going through this possible transition make sure you take care of yourself. Eat well, exercise, surround yourself with good friends and family and do everything for yourself that will give you strength and health to go through a break up if that’s what comes.

Don’t forget to come join me on Facebook, too, at AskApril.com on Facebook at this link: [url][/url]. 😀

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