[Kindguy37]

I was on vacation with my family and met this incredible and we ended up talking for hours During this time our families were also talking and hit it off (she’s in late 20’s, I’m early 30’s). Turns out my family has a vacation place about 1.5 hrs from her and a few months later we went up and I spent a couple days with her. It’ll be a few more months before I’ll be able to see her again.

We really hit it off and have exchanged emails and texts. We both have said how much we enjoy each other’s company and how happy we are our families get along. Lots of joking and compliments. My parents have talked to her parents and emailed each other too.

During our time we hugged, but I was afraid to try and kiss her or do anything to tell her how attracted I am to her or make. I did buy her a bunch of meals and drinks. After I left she said that maybe she’d have to come visit me.

So now what do I do? She said she loves texting, but hates talking on the phone. The fact that our parents email or call each other makes me a little nervous to try and movie it beyond the “friend” stage.

[AskApril Masini]

Ask her out on a date! 😉

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[Kindguy37]

[quote=”April Masini”]Ask her out on a date! 😉

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How? She is in another state now? We won’t be within driving distance till July.

When we were in the same area I asked her out several times just the 2 of us and she agreed.

What do I do now?

[AskApril Masini]

Then, wait until July, when you’re within driving distance, and then ask her out!

Or, you can fly to see her and take her out on a date where she lives.

This seems kind of obvious — am I missing something?

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[Kindguy37]

[quote=”April Masini”]Then, wait until July, when you’re within driving distance, and then ask her out!

Or, you can fly to see her and take her out on a date where she lives.

This seems kind of obvious — am I missing something?

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Yes. I don’t know how to go from the “friend stage” to actually get into a romantic relationship.

When I saw her before I asked her out to multiple meals with just the 2 of us and we spent a couple days together. If I ask her to spend time and do things with me again in July how will this lead us to be romantically involved? I don’t want to just “be friends” with her if she’s as interested in me as I am in her. I’d like to be in a real relationship with her and consider marrying her. So how do I get there from where we are now?

[AskApril Masini]

Hmmmm….. You asked what to do, and I answered, but now you seem to be rephrasing the same question in different ways, and avoiding my answer. So let me ask you a question: Is there a reason that you won’t simply ask her out on a date? ❓ It’s pretty a straightforward dynamic…. Is there something going on that’s keeping you from asking her out? Dating her is [i]how[/i] you go from friends to romance. 😉

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[Kindguy37]

[quote=”April Masini”]Hmmmm….. You asked what to do, and I answered, but now you seem to be rephrasing the same question in different ways, and avoiding my answer. So let me ask you a question: Is there a reason that you won’t simply ask her out on a date? ❓ It’s pretty a straightforward dynamic…. Is there something going on that’s keeping you from asking her out? Dating her is [i]how[/i] you go from friends to romance. 😉

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I don’t know how to ask her out on a date vs. what I already did, which was plan activities and meals and spend a couple days alone with her. If I spend another couple days with her in July what makes that a relationship vs. 2 friends hanging out? So I guess I’m confused by your answer of “ask her out” since I don’t know what that really means and what steps to take to see if she’s interested in me romantically vs. just a friend.

[AskApril Masini]

Did you kiss her?

[Kindguy37]

[quote=”April Masini”]Did you kiss her?[/quote]

No, but I really want to and wish I knew how to get to the point where I can. Should I kiss her on the cheek to greet her next time I see her? I’m completely clueless how to initiate kissing her on the lips or if it’s even appropriate. We’re laughing and having these great conversations and enjoying each others company, but I don’t know how to figure out if she likes me the way I like her. If she doesn’t I don’t want to do something that embarrasses me and ruins our parents friendship too.

[AskApril Masini]

Have you ever kissed a woman?

[Kindguy37]

Yes, but it was a few years ago and it was after she asked about the relationship and we were spending a lot of time together (in college). She surprised me with the kiss. After that we kissed all the time.

It’s a little different trying to figure out the dynamics when it’s someone where I don’t even know if she liked me that way. It’s also tough because we only have a few days in person. I really like this girl, but I don’t know what to do

[AskApril Masini]

Okay, I’m beginning to get a better picture of what’s going on here. You’re in your early 30s, and you’ve only kissed one woman, but you didn’t initiate the first kiss — in fact, you’ve never initiated a first kiss. And it sounds like you’ve got some anxiety and control issues going on. You seem to need a lot of reassurance that you won’t fail. 😉 What you need to understand is that successful dating requires you to be the kind of person who’d rather take a shot, then live with regrets. That means that sometimes you will fail, and sometimes you won’t — but you’ll be a lot happier if you don’t worry so much about all the bad things that could happen, and instead, date her, kiss her and try to get something going. 😉 And if it doesn’t work out, move on!

I’m going to recommend you buy and read [b]Date Out of Your League[/b], a book I wrote for men who want to win with women. You can get it here: [url]https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/date-out-of-your-league-april-masini/1016394885?ean=9780974676302&itm=1&usri=9780974676302[/url]. You should definitely buy it and read it. Beyond this forum, it will give you a lot of details that will help you feel reassured and confident. 😉

Look, I know that you know what a date is, and what dating looks like — you’ve been to the movies, you’ve read books, you live in the world. You call her up, and invite to go on a date. You pick her up and give her flowers. You hold her hand. You take her somewhere nice. You compliment her. You have fun and get to know each other. You pay for the date. You flirt with her, and you kiss her goodnight at the end of the date, and if things go well, you make out with her.

You are the guy, and it’s up to you to take the lead — whether it’s hand holding, kissing her, caressing her hair, flirting with her, complimenting her, getting to know her. That’s your job. 😉 Read the book for details, and don’t worry so much that it holds you back from getting what you want. 😉

I hope that helps!

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