[beatinu121]

My girlfriend and I had a big fight about 3 weeks ago. I was semi living at her house just us two but it wasn’t official. She was too hurt after the fight that we moved my things out of her house. I told her that she’s still my girlfriend and that I love her after we dropped my stuff off at mine. In the first week I wrote her an email saying all the things that I loved about her, where we needed to improve together and then re-affirming we are still together. She texted saying she needed sometime to think about stuff. She then called me about 4 days later in tears saying how much she loved me, missed me but how much she hates me. We agreed to have 1 week of no contact and agreed to meet up the following Monday. So we met last Monday for about 4 hours at a coffee shop. Just spoke about stuff, she couldn’t touch me or even stand me putting my arm round her. She was quite teary eyed and said she didn’t know how she could come back from the fight or recover. She said she needed time to heal by herself. But I said so we’re broken up? She said she’s not sure. She loves me so much but feels so pushed away and needs to heal. She didn’t know how much time she needed nor if we were just going on a break and still exclusive or if she wanted to go and get with other people. I said I still have some things at hers and said could I come and pick them up. She said she’d drop them off this coming Sunday. Before we left the coffee shop I said you are still my girlfriend I’m here. I know you need your space and I love you, I will see you this Sunday.

That night I realised I actually needed a file asap and called her to say can I get it earlier before Sunday as I need it. I suggested either getting it couriered over, or I come pick it up or she drop it off. She was happy for me to come pick it up the next day. So the next day I go pick up the file along with my other stuff. I then gave her a lift to her friends house where she was having dinner that evening (I was going in that direction anyway). When I dropped her off I told her again I love you, you are my girlfriend. She said she loved me too and the put lips up for me to peck her on the lips goodbye. I said I’m still and love you after and she said I just need some space right now. I said I know, I know you do.

I tried calling her yesterday later afternoon twice but she didn’t pick up. So I text her saying “Hey, how are you doing?! I tried calling a couple of times but I’m in the middle of nowhere so not sure if I came through. Saw some great springers today which made me think of you…X”

She didn’t respond to the above text.

So first things first the Tuesday meeting was good that she was able to kiss me again (albeit a peck). She looked very broken and hurt though. Now how much space should I give? Are we broken up, is she still my gf? Can I contact her or now at all?

I still consider her my girlfriend. I love her so much and am here to fight for her. What’s my next move or what shall I do? She didn’t respond to my text. Shall I wait for her to contact me?

We have a mutual friends party in a week coming up. I don’t think I’ll go to it as she’ll be there and I want to give her space.

[Clara]

It sounds like a doozy of a fight. Can you talk a little bit about what the fight that broke you up was about? I think you have to address this since it sounds like this break up didn’t just happen — it was caused by a specific fight. Fill me in a little more about the fight, and I’ll give you my advice….

[Member]

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