I am a twenty-one year old man who is in a serious relationship. Everything is good except one thing. My girlfriend hates romance. I’m a hopeless romantic. She would rather wrestle, hike, camp out, or play video games. I’d rather have candlelit dinners, cuddle on the couch while watching a romantic comedy, or play with her hair. She hates romance movies, or anything to do with romance. When I asked her why, she said it’s all fake and, I quote, “just pointless.” She says it’s all designed to lure a woman into bed. We haven’t had sex yet and I am in no hurry, but I am a hopeless romantic and her continual misunderstanding and dislike of romance really bothers me. She is a wonderful girlfriend in every other respect, but the romance thing is a big deal to me. I thought, when we got together, that I would be able to change her mind about this, but she hasn’t budged. She just doesn’t see romance as I do and doesn’t even know what IS and ISN’T romantic. She cringes at romantic scenes in movies. How can I get her to see romance the way I do, or is this relationship doomed? I don’t want to break up with her. I really love her. I can picture myself married to her very easily and I’ve had the biggest crush on her since junior high. Back then, I was too shy to confront her, but I did about a year ago. I’ve been trying to get her to see romance through my eyes, but, clearly, it isn’t working. What can I do to get her to understand romance isn’t about sex, and isn’t pointless?
