[jsings]

I’ve been talking to/dating/whatever you want to call it, this guy for 7 months now. I’m about to be 21 and he is 20 (in case that matters). He had just gotten out of a 2 year long relationship when he told me that he liked me and wanted to pursue a relationship with me. About 3 months later he said that he needed time to think because he felt like he led things too quickly (which in my mind he didn’t considering all we had done physically at that point was snuggle)…but I guess he didn’t want to “rush” into anything after his long-term relationship. A month after that talk he was ready to pursue a relationship again…but now it’s been almost 3 months again and we are in the same boat. He tells me he likes me a lot and wants to pursue a relationship but hasn’t asked me to be his girlfriend or anything like that. I am SO confused and I’ve talked to him about this a few months ago and don’t know how to bring it up again. I really do like him but this is getting to be ridiculous. His friends even tell me that he talks about me a lot and likes me. So what the heck? This doesn’t make sense.

[April Masini, your AskApril]

When a guy’s words and actions don’t match up, trust his actions. In other words, he’s telling you he wants a relationship, but he’s not really acting like he wants one. You’re banking on his words, and then feeling confused because he isn’t doing what he says he will. The problem is that this is a rebound for him. Ending a two year relationship, especially at his age, 20, is a very big deal. He’s not going to be ready to date again for a while. Whether he knows it or not, you do. 😉 I hope that helps.

[Member]

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