[Anonymous]

I’ve been in a relationship for 10yrs now & my partner has been emotionally & physically unfaithful for most of it with the same person. She was in love with this women for years before we met but this women was in a long term relationship then and still today. My partner has given her up for the past 4yrs but recently they connected online. They miss the friendship but know they have other feelings that cause issues. My partner wants to have her in her life, as a friend and for us to continue our life as planned. I agreed to give her this chance because I have seen changes in both of them. I tell my self that is anything does happen, I will leave but I’m not sure if I’m faced with it, again, that I will. I often ask myself if I could live with occasional physical acts and constant emotional connection…. What should I do? Is is ok to stay if it continues?

[Anonymous]

I forgot to mention that our relationship seems stronger than ever and that my partner plans on seeing a therapist in the near future. Also that I have no education, job or transportation without my partner but that is not the only reason I’ve stayed. Over the past 10yrs the other women (friend as they call it) has been around for maybe half and they’ve psychically cheated on me and her fiance about 4 times. I feel like I love her too much to EVER walk away but I want to respect myself at the same, too. I’m so lost!

[April Masini, your AskApril]

You’ve been a little coy about gender, so I’m guessing you’re a woman in a lesbian relationship and your partner has been cheating on you with another woman. Did I get that right?

If your partner has been cheating on you for ten years — what are you getting out of the relationship? It’s got to be very hard to trust someone who cheats on you over a long period of time, but if you stay in the relationship, you’ve basically consented to the terms. 😳

You mention that you have no car, job or education, but you’re clearly bright enough to get a job, so I hope you won’t feel that you have to stay for the financial benefits you have, but instead, will use this opportunity to create a new life for yourself.

I think you can do better and find someone who WON’T cheat on you over the course of a decade. 😕

I hope that helps. See you @AskAprilcom and on Facebook: [url][/url].

[Member]

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