[shane472]

Hi everyone,

I have a question regarding a situation with my girlfriend of 6 months. Our relationship is pretty serious but she has done some things in her past (before me) that worry me somewhat. Anyway, here’s what happened. The other day I was using her car and noticed it smelled very strongly of stale beer inside. Believe me, I know the smell so there is no way I am mistaking it for something else. She hates beer so I know she wasn’t drinking it but she has a lot of time off during the day while I am at work and I have no clue what she does during that time. I made an offhand comment about the smell and she just said that she didn’t smell anything. I said it definitely smelled like beer and she said I must be imagining it, then changed the subject. I’m not stupid, her car most certainly smells very strongly of beer and that’s not just going to happen for no reason. This is really bothering me, but when I push the subject she gets very defensive. Could this be because she is guilty, or offended because she is innocent? I really have no clue what to believe, but the facts are that she has a lot of time to herself while I am working and that there is a very strong smell of beer in her vehicle. I am worried that maybe she has reconnected with someone from her past. Even if it is not in a romantic sense, she used to be involved with some less-than-desirable people and I’d not like to see her fall back in with that crowd. What should I do?

[Megz327]

Trust her.
If you continue to ask the same questions or start assuming shes doing things shes not, its going to push you guys apart. You asked her, she answered and if you trust her, like you should, then let it be. She has the right to do what she wants with her time, see who she wants and tell you what she feels you need to know. No one wants to feel like they are being controlled or watched under a microscope.
Maybe plan some lunches during the week if you want to see whats shes doing or who shes with and maybe she’ll open up more and let you in about her day.

[April Masini, your AskApril]

Hmmmm….[b]Megz327[/b] says you should trust her, and that’s good advice if your overall impression of her after dating for six months is that she is trustworthy. However, I’m hearing you say you don’t trust her and you don’t know what to do next because you don’t trust her. 😕

Since you already distrust her because of her past, I think this incident is confirming the distrust you’ve been harboring. I hate to be a Debby Downer after [b]Megz327[/b] was so upbeat, but I think your gut is telling you that there is a problem here, and you want me to confirm that gut instinct you’re feeling.

Proceed with caution. 😳

[Member]

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