[DS1]

I have a question and need some advice please. I need to know how to approach or talk to this woman I really like.

The situation is that I work at a supermarket and she is a regular customer, and comes into the shop pretty much daily. Anyway I have noticed her a while now, a few months. It started with her coming into the shop a lot and walking past me and stopping close by looking at stock to buy. I then noticed her looking at me, making eye contact and more recently really holding eye contact for a long time (sometimes it gets a bit intense and uncomfortable, and i have to look away). She doesn’t say anything (except polite stuff hi, sorry etc) other than smiles at me especially when I am on my own working and not many people are around.

I have also seen her outside my work looking at me when I am walking on my dinner hour.

I have said hi and hello once or twice but smiled back many times but it is hard to make it progress into a conversation. I really want to talk to her but don’t know what to say as I am at work and it feels awkward talking to a stranger. The shop is really busy and it will be pretty obvious to everyone what I am doing if I say something cheesy, talking I guess, infront of other customers or collegues.

She has a young child and sometimes comes in with what I assume is her mother but no boyfriend etc. I noticed there is no ring on her finger. I think she is a single mother and likes me but I get shy and frustrated wanting to talk to her.

Without sounding too creepy or full on, how do I talk to her? I guess she finds it hard to talk because of the environment and the work situation also.

What would be the best way of doing this?
Should I try and talk to her in the shop when she is on her own without her child. (this seems really hard and I don’t want to sound stupid using some fake line or opener). what is appropriate to say at work?

or

Talk to her outside when she leaves the shop or when I see her on the street.

What do you suggest?

Are there any questions I could ask her or things I should look out for. To see if she is single or interested.

I just don’t want to end up looking stupid and make a fool of myself, or make her feel uncomfortable.
I know this sounds a bit crazy but I don’t know if I am imagining it or not. What should I say?

Please help.

Many Thanks

[April Masini, your AskApril]

Here are some things that women love to hear: They love to hear that they’re attractive, that they must be good at things and that their children (if they have them) are adorable. So start there. Don’t worry about getting into a conversation — focus on complimenting her. The conversation will flow.

Tell her that her child is adorable. Ask how old he or she is. Ask if it’s her only child. Tell her she must be a good mom because the child always seems so happy. Trust me — this will work. She’ll start asking you questions. Then, there’s always what you have in common — which is that you ring up her food purchases! Comment on the produce she chose (I know this sounds inane, but the point is to get something started, and if you have to tell her that the radishes look really wonderful today, in order to get something going, then so be it! Ask her how she prepares the the salmon she bought or if she prefers tomato or pesto sauce on her pasta! Ask her if she needs help with her groceries out to the car. Ask her if she likes her Honda Civic — or whatever the car is — and how long she’s had it, etc.

I think you get the general idea. I hope that helps. Let me know how it goes.

And please follow me @AskAprilcom on Twitter.

[Member]

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