[Mandarin27]

Hello, I’m 24 years old and I need some advice…

I was in a 5 year old relationship until she left me, 2 months after that she asked me to try again and I accepted, we were together for SIX DAYS! and she disappeared. She came online 10 days later telling me that she didn’t want to see me/chat with me/text me/talk to me, etc because we were going to be together back and forth and she didn’t want that, and she asked me to delete her from facebook, messenger, etc.
I told her to do that herself since she was the one who wanted that, and so she did after a day.

We didn’t contact each other for 8 months, not even once, and now she’s with a guy (I bet my pants it’s a rebound relationship).
After those 8 months I texted her to get my bike back, so I went to her building and we met outside, as soon as she saw me tears started to drop from her eyes and I was very confused, I just asked her if she was ok and she only replied “yes, sorry”.
I asked her about her family and stuff and she started to cry again, so I grabbed my bike, waited until she calmed down and said “take care” and left (and started to cry a block away lol).

2 days after that I texted her asking if she was ok and she told me that it was strange to see me and talk to me again, and she thought I was going to ignore her that day because of what she did to me and that she deserved it , I told her I had no hard feelings, that it’d be unfair to only keep that last thing of a 5 year relationship that was so sweet, that I wasn’t mad and I never were, and she said she was happy to know that.

And that’s all, a month has passed since then and I miss her a lot, I followed the No Contact rule for 8 months and I didn’t drunk dial her or anything stupid, but I’m starting to feel it’s time to do something about it, I’m not very sure what, that’s why I’m asking for advice, maybe I should move on but I still feel there’s something I can do to get her back, I love her.

About her bf: her facebook only says “has a relationship” and she has no photos with the guy, which is not common for her, that makes me think he’s a rebound relationship and not more than that, but once again, I’m not the expert.

Thanks!

Advice VERY appreciated ❗

[Anonymous]

i have a somewhat similar deal going on so i am curious to any advice you may get on this. i hope it works out for you.

[Mandarin27]

No opinion, April?

[April Masini, your AskApril]

If you want to try and win her over, then get my book Date Out of Your League, read it, and follow the advice in it. Here’s the link: [url]https://www.askapril.com/relationship-dating-advice/date-out-of-your-league.html[/url]. This is the book I wrote for men who want to win with women, and clearly, that’s what you want to do! 😉

Just make sure she’s actually someone you WANT. 😕 You may get her and she may pull the same disappearing act again, since it isn’t really clear to me from your post why she did what she did when she disappeared after a five year relationship and then again after your two month reunion. 😕 It doesn’t sound like she is very mature and it doesn’t sound like she has many relationship tools to help her deal with her feelings in relationships. Is this really Ms. Right for you?

If you still want to give it a try, then read the book and follow the instructions in there. If not, move on, but the next time around try and find someone who’s more stable.

I hope that helps. Let me know how things go. And join me on Facebook. I’d love to have you as a free member of AskApril.com on Facebook at this link: [url][/url].

[Mandarin27]

Hello April, gratitude for your words, I’m kinda shocked with who she is now, I’ll try to resume and then to the question…

She hated my 2 dogs when she was home with me, now she’s in some kind of “animal rescue”organization, totally not her but, that’s where she met her boyfriend…

She even changed her religion and political beliefs, her musical taste and even how she expresses herself, she was much more interesting when I met her than now (I simply don’t buy her new her)

My question is (of course I realized I don’t like the new her but I still want to know) can a person change so dramatically after a break up? has she really changed or she’s trying to fit into her new social environment?
I mean, people can change, but to change EVERYTHING you are sounds more like a lie to me, but once again…I’m not the expert, please enlighten me 😀

[April Masini, your AskApril]

Yes, people can change after a break up. Mostly it’s a time to test new waters, which is what she’s doing. Experimenting isn’t a bad thing — in fact it’s a way to figure out what you like; what feels right; and what kind of life you want to lead. That’s what she’s doing. 🙂

[Mandarin27]

So you think it’s completely normal if your boyfriend has been a vegan and when he broke up with you he started making BBQ parties with steaks, fried chicken and pork chops? just asking..

[April Masini, your AskApril]

I’ve already given you my opinion and my advice. Why argue with [i]me[/i]? 😕

Again, yes. It is normal for people to change their diet and try new things because of different influences in their lives and different desires to be creative and test the waters. If she wants to be a vegetarian one day and a carnivore the next, that’s her business. Not yours. 😳

Focus on YOUR changes in YOUR life because this is YOUR opportunity to make whichever ones you want! 🙂

Please join me on Facebook at this link: [url][/url].

[Mandarin27]

Do you really think I can get her back if I use your book? I don’t care about the money, I care about being hurt more than I already was 😕 so please tell me if I have a chance or I should move on…thank you.

[April Masini, your AskApril]

I do think you have a chance, but again, you have to decide if you want someone who comes and goes in and out of your life without a lot of warning!

Read the book. It’s a low risk possible solution. I wouldn’t have suggested your reading it if I didn’t think it would work. 😆 Here’s the link to buy it: [url]https://www.askapril.com/relationship-dating-advice/date-out-of-your-league.html[/url].

Let me know what you think after you read it, and if the tips and advice work for you.

And join me on Facebook. Here’s that link: [url][/url]

[Member]

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