[trying2date1982]

I’ve been talking to this new guy at work quite a bit lately…nice guy…seems to go out of his way to talk with me about non-work related stuff…seems to show up unexpectedly for no reason other than to say hello…tells me about his family, hobbies, etc….kind of flirty…lots of eye contact, etc., etc.,…others I work with have commented on the “chemistry” they see…so, I decide to ask him if he wants to go and get a beer together. I’m pretty shy about stuff like this, so even asking this was kind of hard for me. Anyway, his response was…”in what context do you mean have a beer?” I explain that I mean have a beer…he says do you mean like have a beer, talk, hang out? I say …yes, that’s what I mean. He says, yeah we can probably do that. I ask what he means by “to what extent.” Unfortunately, at that time, he gets called away but says “we’ll talk” before leaving. What in the heck does that mean?!!?? I know he has just split up with a long-term relationship about a month ago, but it was his choice to do that and he split with her. I’m wondering if that has something to do with his response…maybe doesn’t want to jump into something else so quickly? Maybe it’s because we work together? Any thoughts?

[April Masini, your AskApril]

He wanted to know if you were asking him out on a date or asking him to get a drink as a friend. His hesitancy means he’s either taken aback that you took his opportunity to ask you out, away from him and/or he’s just not that interested in you as a date.

I never recommend that women ask guys out because it takes their opportunity to chase you, away from them. It also confuses everyone because now you don’t know what he means, and he’s not sure he wants to ask you out any more — if he ever did.

My advice is to drop the pursuit. Men love to chase women, and they love to feel like they’ve captured a prize. When you take that opportunity away from them, you’re robbing them of the opportunity for them to feel great about themselves and you!

Read Think & Date Like A Man, [url]https://www.askapril.com/relationship-dating-advice/think-and-date-like-a-man.html[/url], a book I wrote for women who want to find, get and keep Mr. Right — and follow the tips and advice in the book so you’ll have a much easier time dating. 🙂

I hope that helps.

Please follow me @AskAprilcom on Twitter and on Facebook at this link: [url][/url].

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