[BETH8073]

I met a guy on a dating website and didn’t meet him face to face right away. I was a little nervous about rejection. Anyways, I finally met up w/him and had a great time. The date even ended w/kisses that didn’t want to stop on either end. I didn’t call the next day, but got a text from him letting me know how his softball game went. He even let me know he wasn’t very good. The next day, I “blew him a kiss” on the dating website. He sent one back. He did say he was going away for the weekend, but I haven’t heard from him. I’m not good at the whole dating thing, which I why I’m asking what I should do. I don’t think it’s a big deal, but I REALLY want to see him again. I was able to be myself around him and it felt really nice. He even kept showing my pictures of his niece, which I’ve never had a guy do. I just don’t want to go crazy wondering what I should or shouldn’t do.

[April Masini, your AskApril]

I appreciate your feeling nervous about rejection, but if you can find a different way to look at rejection, you won’t be nervous. Let me see if I can help you with that. Relationships involve 2 people — not just yourself, so in order for them to go well, both people have to like each other enough to want a second date, etc. If this guy doesn’t want a second date with you, then he’s doing you a favor by conveying that message. That way you won’t waste your time with someone who’s not interested in you.

I know that it’s disappointing to not get what you want, but that’s life — especially when you’re dating. It’s great that you like this guy enough to want a second date, but in order for you to get a second date, he has to want one enough to call you and schedule one. If he doesn’t do that, he doesn’t want what you want.

Dating is a numbers game. The more you know what you want, the more likely you’re able to find that in someone else, and the only way to know if you’ve found that is to put yourself out there in the dating world. If a fear of rejection stops you from dating, then you’re really limiting yourself.

So here’s what you do: Don’t call this guy again or go after him online. You’ve made it really clear that you like him enough to date him again. Now the ball’s in his court. But don’t wait by the phone — put yourself out there, and play the field until you’ve finally found someone who wants you as much as you want them, and is willing to walk the walk to make you his.

[Ethan Morales]

First off, what April said is dead-on: you’ve shown interest, you’ve made your feelings clear, and now it’s his move. That’s literally all you can do. If he’s interested, he’ll reach out; if he’s not, you won’t waste more time wondering why. That uncertainty? That’s the dangerous part it can make you obsess or overanalyze things that aren’t under your control.

The other point is about perspective. Rejection isn’t a reflection of your worth it’s just a reflection of fit. Dating is two people’s choices aligning, not a competition or a test of how “good” you are. If he doesn’t pursue a second date, it’s not personal in the grand scheme; it’s just that he doesn’t feel the same urgency to see you again. That’s painful, but it’s also freeing once you accept it.

Now, here’s the practical part: stop checking your phone, stop sending messages, and stop replaying every detail in your head. You’ve done your part. The ball is in his court. Anything beyond that is wasted emotional energy. If he wants a second date, he’ll schedule it. If not, you’re free to move on without feeling guilty.

And don’t put your life on hold. Go meet other people, stay social, do things that make you happy. The more you keep living, the more natural your confidence grows which is exactly what attracts people who are genuinely interested. The ones who are meant to chase you? They’ll make it obvious.let go of control over him, focus on yourself, and trust that the right person will match your effort. Anything else is just overthinking.

[Serena Vale]

You had a great first date, the chemistry was there, the vibe was easy, and the kisses weren’t one-sided. That’s all good. But after that first spark, the person who wants to see you again shows you they want to see you again. They don’t disappear for days and leave you overthinking.

Him texting about softball? Cute. Him sending a kiss back? Also nice. But those are light, low-effort touches. They’re not actions that say, “I want to see you again.”

And I get it, when you really like someone, your mind loops on every detail.
“Did he mean this?”
“Should I text again?”
“Is he busy?”

But here’s the truth: if a man is interested, you won’t be sitting here wondering. He’ll make it clear. They always do.

So what should you do?
Nothing.
You already showed interest. The ball is in his court. Don’t chase, don’t send little hints, don’t keep checking your phone. Let him make the next move if he wants one.

And if he doesn’t?
That’s not rejection, that’s redirection.
It means he’s not your person, and you get to save your time, your heart, and your energy for someone who actually wants to show up.

Dating is a numbers game, but it’s also about energy, you should match people who match you. Effort for effort. Interest for interest. You can be into someone, but they need to show they’re into you too.

So keep your heart open, keep meeting people, and don’t sit in limbo waiting for someone who might already be showing you his answer through silence.

When a guy wants you, trust me, you’ll feel it, not question it.

[Natalie Noah]

It sounds like you had a genuinely sweet, natural connection with him the kind that feels rare, especially when dating has felt awkward or intimidating. And when something feels that good, it’s normal to want more…and to overthink every quiet moment that follows. But what April said is true in spirit: a connection is only real if both people want to meet in the middle. You showed interest in a warm, balanced way the kiss, the follow-up, the playful online interaction and that was enough. If he felt the same spark and wanted to build on it, he’d pick up that thread. Not hearing from him doesn’t mean you did anything wrong; it just means he may not be able to offer the consistency or enthusiasm your heart deserves.

And this is where I want you to be gentle with yourself. Don’t punish your heart for being hopeful, and don’t chase someone who isn’t showing up with the same energy. Dating isn’t about proving your worth; it’s about discovering who mirrors it back to you. You don’t have to call, nudge, or perform to stay on someone’s radar. You already did your part beautifully. Now let him show whether he’s capable of meeting you. And while you wait don’t freeze your heart for someone who may never follow through. Keep living, keep meeting new people, keep staying open. The right person won’t make you guess, or worry, or chase. They’ll just choose you, clearly and steadily, the way you deserve.

[Member]

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