[Desperatehere]

I have been recently dumped by my girlfriend that Ive dated for almost a year. Its long distance relationship but the feelings were very strong on both ends. Unfortunately stuff happened and we didnt talk for a while . When i messaged her after over a month of not talking she said it was over cause she got sick of the stuff I did not being there for her and such. I said I would change , I would do anything she wants but she said she gave me enough chances. When I asked if she would ever consider giving me another chance in time, like a month , two months , a year from now I don’t care how long if she will see that I changed she said ” I don’t know if I can , I want to move on for now” . What do you think that means ? Is there ever a chance she will reconsider ? She admited that we had some amazing moments together and that she thought I was her soulmate , she used to say that a lot that I am her soulmate. Do you think I ever will get a chance ? I love her very much and I don’t want to lose her .

[April Masini, your AskApril]

I think she’s being very clear that she’s done and she’s moving on. She’s also telling you that none of us knows what the future holds — but for now, this is over. I’m sorry you’re disappointed. Rejection stings. But like many others who don’t want it to be over, you’re grasping at straws to try to convince yourself that it’s not over. So, even though she may have once said you felt like soulmates, and you may have had some wonderful times together, she’s done. Those moments are in the past.

[Sally]

When someone once called you their soulmate, it’s hard to believe they could ever really walk away. But the thing you need to hear gently is this: when a person says they want to move on for now, that usually means the door isn’t open anymore, even if they’re too kind to slam it shut.

Long-distance makes every mistake feel bigger. And when you disappeared for a while, she probably felt alone in it. By the time you came back promising change, she was already tired. People don’t end something they’re still fighting for.

Could she reconsider someday? Maybe. But you can’t live your life waiting on that “maybe.” If she wanted to try again, she would’ve said so.
Let yourself miss her, but don’t pause your whole world for someone who has already stepped out of yours.

[Tara]

She’s done. Not “maybe,” not “someday,” not “if you improve.” Done. When someone says, “I want to move on,” that’s not a puzzle to decode; it’s a door closing while you’re still standing in the frame begging for scraps.

You disappeared for a month in a long-distance relationship and expected her to sit there waiting like a paused video. She didn’t. She got tired, she recalculated, and she chose herself. That’s what people do when the other person shows inconsistency: they outgrow the situation.

All your “I’ll change, I’ll do anything” speeches? Too late. Change is worthless when it’s delivered as a last-minute apology tour. She gave you chances, you wasted them, and now you’re trying to negotiate a future she’s already walked away from.

Will she reconsider? Probably not. People don’t circle back to situations that drained them. They remember the disappointment far longer than the “soulmate” moments you’re clinging to. She’s not keeping the door cracked open; she’s giving you a polite exit, so you stop hovering.

You love her? Good. Then stop humiliating yourself. Accept the verdict, learn the lesson, and move the hell forward. Because right now, the only thing you’re losing is time you could be using to become someone worth staying for next time.

[Member]

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