I have been with my boyfriend for almost 6 years, we are both 21 and I love him with all of my heart. I am in post secondary school and he is done his post secondary, but has bad depression and anxiety so hasn’t been able to work in his field.
We have been battling his depression and anxiety our entire relationship. But Ive run out of answers. He is medicated and is seeing a therapist.
On to the next part of my issue, an old super close friend of ours came back into our lives 5 months ago, and recently I’ve been finding myself thinking of him the way I think of my boyfriend.
I thought I had it figured out a couple weeks ago and narrowed it down to me craving normalcy in my love life. After battling my boyfriends depression and anxiety I’m sure it would take a toll on anyone to at least think about what it would be like to date someone without mental health problems. All that in mind I still think it’s something more, but my feelings for my boyfriend haven’t lessened, maybe my physical attraction has, but that’s because of his lack of confidence.
Our friend ( my boyfriends BEST friend) is sweet, caring, selfless, funny, rambunctious, working a real career, independent, attractive, intelligent, and sensitive. Many of the same qualities as my boyfriend. But he is also trying to work out a relationship with his ex. And has been with a plethora of women, which intimidates me.
Our friend and I hang out alone, and with my boyfriend. Him and I go out for breakfast alone when my boyfriend is working, and we just talk about random things, life, our relationships, hard times, the past, and our dreams. we have never discussed any type of feelings with each other, but he asks to hang out with me just as much and I ask of him.
I’m so confused. I love my boyfriend, we don’t have any thing wrong with our relationship except for his depression and Anxiety which hinders us from making long term plans, big financial decisions, and the only thing I don’t like about our relationship is his lack of independence. But that comes with the the territory of being young with mental health problems.
What do I do? Do I fight the fight with my boyfriend? Or do I explore my feelings for our friend, provided he feels something for me as well. Do I even bring it up to either of them?
I’m sure of my feelings for my boyfriend, I love him, I’m in love with him, and I could see us living the rest of our lives together. But I also imagine myself with my friend.
Are my feelings for my friend real, or am I craving normalcy in my love life?
