[filmsiren]

I need one honest answer to get some closure in this situation thats driving me insane. It seems like all the info I find doesn’t apply to me! HELP!
So I met this guy, we both recently ended our mutual relationships so I was a bit hesitant but we went ahead and met up. We had instant chemistry, bonded and sparks were flying all over the place. No kissing, no sex. Good night.
Two days later we met for a movie, I felt like we were close friends so he came over my place to hang out. He kissed me, we kissed.
The following day he came over, we kissed, had sex.
Day after day, text messages, surprise visits during the day and on day five he gave me an expensive watch with a card saying that he was incredibly happy to have met me!
He met my mom, acted like part of the family, met my friends, came to dinner with them and payed for the whole meal. Everyone assumed we were dating.
During the next days we “dated”, went to the beach, out for pizza, he helped me paint a room in my house, did his work right next to me, and brought me gifts from his work.
After 3 weeks he started acting strange. Distant, I felt that something was up. Up to last saturday in which he sent me a text message saying that he needed some space to let go of some sentimental issues that are draining him and that he hopes I understand and he will call me in the week. I answered his text 3 days later saying that I hadnt received it, that I hoped he was well and that he has a friend in me.
I haven’t entirely closed the chapter with my ex so I can understand him not being ready to commit but I dont believe I acted like I was expecting that. I told him from the beginning that I wanted to live in the present and was not looking for a relationship…
I really want to know where I stand, should I just be grateful that I got a great watch from all this?

Thank you
Desperate in Despair

[April Masini, your AskApril]

It’s hard to explain his behavior because clearly something happened in his life that you know nothing about. His sudden rejection has nothing to do with you or anything you said or did, based on what you wrote me. Everything was going fine — until something in his life without you changed.

You have a right to be angry that he shut you out after being so intimate and sending you all the signs that he was into you. You also have a right to be happy you dodged a bullet. Imagine if he did this disappearing act after six months or more?! 😕

The only advice I can give you for future is to get to know someone a lot better before getting so involved with them. It sounds like you were very open in sharing your family with him, but he may not have introduced you to his family, friends, showed you his home, etc. Getting to know a person through these experiences gives you information you can use to decide if you want to continue dating them. When you sense a man is “compartmentalizing” you and keeping you separate from the rest of his life, you may want to give the relationship a flashing yellow pause light until you get to know him better and feel it’s safe to proceed with caution.

I hope this helps — let me know how it goes. And please join me on Facebook at this link: [url][/url].

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