I have been dating my current boyfriend for almost a year now; however we have been friends and have known each other for about 10 years. We have always been close as friends and know a lot about one another – maybe too much. Lately, I seem to be having a difficult time dealing with the fact that he slept with certain people (who I know) before we dated officially. Backing up a bit, I had a bf for the past 5 years prior to us dating, who i should have broken up with after 2 years. About November 2009, he was talking to this girl but nothing serious. At the beginning of November, I cheated on my bf of 5 years with one of my current bf’s good friends. After this, he was really upset with me (claiming he was mad that I cheated on my bf) and he wouldn’t talk to me for a couple months ( I didn’t see him until April 2010). After I did this, he slept with the girl he said he wasn’t so serious with and another girl less than a month later (who I also know). For some reason, I cannot get over this. I don’t know if it’s the fact that I may resent him for not talking to me for a couple months and trying to get close to other girls like we were, because before this, we were incredibly close. I kind of felt like the other girls took my place. Last summer, I finally broke up with my bf of 5 years and right afterwards, my current bf expressed to me that he wanted to be serious and that he always wanted me as his gf. Why can’t I get over this? It is causing us to fight and I find myself, randomly throughout my day, constantly having visual scenerios in my head of him sleeping with these girls and I seem to want to know everything about it even though I know it is something that will upset me more. Please help me get over this so that we can be happy again! I know he loves me very much and shows me everyday and I should concentrate on the present and future but I just can’t stop thinking about his sexual past!
