[Km2014]

There’s this girl I have been talking to for a about a month or 2. We would
text each other for hours each day. I finally decided to ask her out and Monday
we had our first date. The entire time leading up to the date she would
constantly message me and tell me how excited she was and how much she was
looking forward to our date. When we finally met up that Monday she hugged me. I
wasn’t expecting that. We went out to eat she drove I don’t have a car at the
moment I’ll have mine back in about a month. After we went out to eat she took
me and showed me the house she grew up in as kid. We then went back to my place.
I was a complete gentleman so I didn’t try to get in her pants, make a move, or
anything like that. We talked and I showed her around she saw my music equipment
and had me play violin for her. We then talked some more she stayed at my place
for about 4 hours. She hugged me again before she left I walked her to her car
and we hugged once more we talked for a few minutes longer and I gave her $20
gas money. She said she’ll take it this time and but not next time this will be
for both. She then asked me for another hug. I thought the date went well. I
messaged her a few hours after our date and thanked her for spending her time
with me. I also told her I had a great time and that she was good company. She
replied thanks for listening to me babble. I messaged her the next day asking
her if she would like to have a picnic date at the park this weekend. She replied “I’m so
sorry I will be out of town by then 🙁 I’ll be in Ohio at cedar point. for my
friends birthday” We shared a few more messages and she revealed she didn’t
really feel like talking. She said she had just gotten off the phone with her
lawyer and he refused to take her case because she didn’t stand a chance at
winning. She lost custody of her son a few weeks back that much I do know is
true. Shes been trying to retrial it to no avail. She asked if she could message
me when she calms down. I told her yeah of course and told her sending many
hugs your way. I also sent her the info to some other legal counsel who might
take her case. She thanked me for my support and told me how kind I was to help
her. I haven’t heard from her since. What should I do? I sent a message Thursday
but it was just a generic “Hi” She never responded which is unlike her. She also
posted on her facebook today talking about how she’s excited for Cedar Point
next weekend … I’m a bit suspicious now seeing as how she told me she’d be
there today… I’m thinking maybe she just isn’t interested anymore? What do you think I should do? What is the best way to proceed? The whole losing custody of her child creates a crazy dynamic. I honestly like her and care about her .” I’ve asked some friends and they said to message her today so I did here’s how that went.

me- hey how are you?

her- Good how are you
me- Pretty good. I wasn’t sure if it was ok to message you or not

her- Yes… You can text or message me whenever lol
me- Well i didn’t know. The last time I talked to you you were pretty upset

her- Im sorry 🙁

me- It’s ok you’ve been through the ringer lately
I was just waiting for you to message back but when almost a week went by I got a little worried about u lol

her- I just get caught up in my head sometimes i havnt really talked to anyone until today

me- Yeah it’s cool. I do that too sometime
quite often actually
Am I disturbing you now? If I am just let me know. I don’t want to bother you or be a nuisance.

her- Never!! You are fine lol dont worry so much youll turn into me

me- Well I it’s hard to gage were people are somtime. Your vibe and aura are still a bit different than usual

her- I dont make it easy lol

me- I’m sure you don’t lol

her- I had an axiety attack the other day it could just be the fact that i am still trying to figure it out

me- See I knew something was off whack lol.

her- Yupp i had a breakdown and now i feel guilty to my friends who were here soo that might be it

me- yeah those things suck. I’ll let you in on secret that I don’t tell many people. A real secret

her- Yay!!

(For some reason she’s always been trying to get me to tell her a secret so I told her about my anxiety issues in the past. I thought that might make feel more accepted and not so alone)

her- Im really sorry you had to go through all that. You seem quite grounded to me i never would have guessed that. I shake a lot not bad but just constantly but it does get me when im angry upset or nervous. Thats kind of scary though i dont want to be that bad at all

me- Yeah that was a really long time ago though.
I’m totally ok now 🙂

her- Im happy you told me. It takes a lot to tell people your secrets like that and i feel honored that you felt comfortable enough to trust me with that 🙂

me- Lul thanks. I hope that didn’t change your perception of me. Like I don’t want you to think negatively of me now. I honestly don’t know why I told you all of that. I don’t know Sierra I just don’t know. There’s something about you lol.
But hey I’m about to to take a shower. Is it ok if I message you later?

her- Yes you can message me whenever you want lol and it didnt change anything in my mind at all

I honestly don’t know what to do. I’ve never encountered this kind of situation before. I messaged her back but still no response. How should I proceed? I want to be there for her but at the same time I don’t want to back off entirely and abandon her. I want to be her friend but I don’t want to get friend zoned and at the same time I don’t want to keep pestering her seeing if she’s ok. What to do what to do?? Thank you for your help.

[April Mașini, your AskApril]

Ask her out on a second date! That’s what you should do now.

You might also want to read [b]Date Out of Your League[/b], a book I wrote for men because it has a lot of advice that a you’re going to find helpful. You can get the book here: [url]https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/date-out-of-your-league-april-masini/1016394885?ean=9780974676302&itm=1&usri=9780974676302[/url].

[b]Everyone likes to be liked! If the advice you found on AskApril.com was helpful “like” us on FB — and tell a friend!
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And… you can follow my interviews and advice in the press on Twitter [i]@AskAprilcom[/i][/b]

[Km2014]

Ok April so I asked here for a second date I picked a place day and time. Her response was “Yes but dont make it entirely set in stone i have to check my planner just in case.” Do you think I’m wasting my time here? Or is there actually a chance? I know shes been going through a lot this week losing the custody of her kid tuesday and she said she went to a funeral this weekend… I like her but the whole vibe is way different now. I feel like she’s no longer interested. What’s the best way to proceed in a situation like this? I mean she’s had it rough lately. I don’t want to be pushy or annoying i.e texting and messaging her but I’m concerned about her but at the same time. We went from speaking daily to hardly at all With all this stuff going on in her life. I just don’t know how to proceed…

[April Mașini, your AskApril]

Since you’ve already started a string of posts here: https://www.askapril.com/forums2/viewtopic.php?f=1&t=324763&p=356727#p356727, please repost this string you’ve started here, on that string of posts as a “reply” to the last one. It’s much easier for me (and anyone else here who wants to weigh in) to read your history in one place. I’ll look out for the repost, and I’ll answer your questions there when they’re re-posted. 😀

[b]Everyone likes to be liked! If the advice you found on AskApril.com was helpful “like” us on FB — and tell a friend!
[url][/url]
And… you can follow my interviews and advice in the press on Twitter [i]@AskAprilcom[/i][/b]

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