First of all, congratulations on the weight loss and healthy lifestyle! That’s great news for you. 😀 And it’s great to hear you’re dating. The best way to approach his roach-y apartment is with a sense of humor. Gift wrap a can of Raid and a coupon for an exterminator, and then tell him how crazy you are about him, but not his “pets” and then give him the “gifts”. Nobody should have to contemplate sex in an apartment with roaches — let alone a snack in front of the television. While insects are part of life in many places around the world, so, too are exterminators and insect killer — and daily, weekly or monthly housekeepers to make sure the place is clean. You can balance charming him with asking him to take care of his roach problems, and until he does, don’t stay there. Again, keep this problem in balance — it is NOT a deal breaker, but it is something he needs to take care of — no matter who he’s with! 😉
As for sex, it’s a process and a creative and romantic journey and sex usually gets better with time as both people learn about each other, themselves, and what pleases them. Again, your sense of humor and patience will be better tools in the bedroom than anything that comes with batteries! So, no, this is not a deal breaker from what you’ve written, it’s just an early step in a new relationship for someone who hasn’t dated in four years, but is now back in the game. 😀
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