The basic problem is you’re spending too much time with him too soon, to get a clear perspective on whether or not he’s someone you want to continue dating, let alone have sex with. Usually, I suggest you spend the first three months of dating someone to decide if you even want to continue seeing him. If you do, then you should spend the next three months of dating him to decide if you want to be monogamous. Usually, that involves seeing him once a week or more. Pretty normal.
You’ve put the time you’re spending together in overdrive, so the relationship feels a lot more intense than it would if you were dating on a more normal time frame. That’s the basic problem. There are a lot of different ways to get to know someone. Spending a certain number of hours together is one way. But also spending a certain number of months together is another. Sometimes seeing someone once a month for four hours allows you better perspective than spending 20 hours together in three days. You’re trying to figure out if this guy wants a commitment to you before having sex with him and the obvious answer is: It’s way too soon to know.
So if you want to take pressure off the sex question, my advice is to spread out the time your’e with him over time.
I hope that helps. 🙂
