I married my husband 11 months ago and it’s my first marriage. He is the stepfather to my son whom absolutely adores him.
First let me give you some back history so you may understand the full situation. I was engaged to my now husband for a year and unfortunately we couldn’t make it work then. We loved each other deeply but didn’t know how to communicate. So we broke up and moved on. A year passed by and we reconnected. Our new relationship was amazing. We were communicating in a healthy way finally. We got married. Our marriage was wonderful… Until a month ago when I discovered pictures of him and my sister kissing, cuddling on his boat at sunset, and other images that crushed me to the core. They had a 2 week long affair only 6 days after we split up. And when we got back together neither of them told me about this before I married him. When I found these pictures I obviously felt betrayed by my husband and my sister. To this day she feels no remorse and says, “You two broke up. What ever happened was between us. It’s our business and you have no right to be upset!” Am I living in the twilight zone? This is my sister! We haven’t spoke for 3 weeks.Now as for my husband, he was apologetic and remorseful. He scheduled counseling sessions for us to get past this. He was willing to do the work to get past this.Fast forward a week and a half later, we have an argument over normal couple stuff. He blows up. Long story short, he shoved me into a wall, head butted me twice, pinned me on the ground, raised his fist to me twice, and called me the worst things imiganable. I made him leave the house. He stayed away for 3 days. When we finally talked he blamed things that happened in our past for his behavior. Eventually, we talked, he said it would never happen again.Fast forward 2 weeks later… We have a silly argument again. That turned into him shoving me into the bathroom counter as hard as he would a man. My elbow was bleeding and it knocked the breath out of me. He stood over me saying he had no problem divorcing me. After calmly standing up,in pure shock,he begged my forgiveness.I told him I was filing for divorce. And I should have called the police I know. But he’s my husband. After an hour he asked to take a walk with me to talk and I agreed. He straightened up for a few days but then he started again. He treated me with disrespect. After trying to calmly talk to him about our issues, he just shuts off, becomes defensive and mean. I asked him today if he even loves me, he said, “No, I probably don’t.” He’s begged for my forgiveness, says he doesn’t want to live without me, etc. then the next day, torture. Just now, he sent me a text saying, “I do love you.” It’s a never ending roller coaster.
I don’t believe in giving up on marriage so easily. Should I give this time? Divorce? My sons feelings? Help.
