"April Mașini answers questions no one else can and tells you the truth that no one else will."

I Bee-Lieve

Does he still like me? What do i do??

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  • #8207
    limegreenlover
    Member #375,430

    Long story short I met Dan in November ,We spent Xmas and xmas eve together & he asked me to his house for a NYE party. So NYE i got a call from my drunken friends who needed me to pick them up. I was on the phone when Dan walked in & introduced me to his best friends Tom & Ryan. I tried my best to be polite and say hello but i was taking on the phone trying to locate my friend at the same time so i was kinda ignoring them. The next morning i asked Ramon if we should stop seeing other people & his reply was “do you think that’s a good question after last night ” . I called him and thought we talked it out but i guess not because he stopped texting me as often. He didn’t ask to see me for a month.

    So here we are at his house ,We talk about NYE and he expressed his anger and i apologized .Then out of the blue he showed me all his messages & said see i don’t talk to anyone else. I didn’t show mine .We then spent the night having a great conversation, in my option the best we’ve ever had. At the end of the night i tried to have sex but he told me since i had previously said i wanted to wait , he did too so the first time together would be special. we fell asleep during a good convo& i went home the next morning .
    Well after that hedidn’t call or text me for a couple weeks. i texted him &he only replied a couple times .Fast forward to a week ago, he texts me saying hello , i reply, and he doesn’t ! Last night he texted my friend and i in a group message asking us to go see a show with him next week. We all were replying and somehow his friend Ryan(from NYE) got brought up & i said i still felt bad for being rude & Ramon said “good luck bouncing back he’s my bff”. THEN my friend said she was going to feel like a third wheel at the show with us and Ramon said ” Were all friends silly, no ones third wheeling, i’m going for the music” . I’m just confused? He previously told me he really liked me & tlked about our future together so why did he stop seeing me out of nowhere & now pops back up &says we’re friends !? I rlly like him a lot & hVw feelings and don’t know how to handle this .

    #19505
    Ask April Masini
    Keymaster

    Sounds like he was embarrassed and angry that he didn’t get your full and undivided attention when he introduced you to his two best friends to you at the New Year’s Eve party where you were on the telephone when he was making the introduction. This is really an etiquette issue — where if he’d seen you were on the phone and waited until you were off to introduce you, this friction wouldn’t have happened. Instead, he expected you to hang up and put him first. And, truth is you could have — but, with no judgment from me, you focused on the phone call. The bottom line is this didn’t have to be a big deal, and unfortunately, he’s still holding onto this three month old issue.

    The other thing is that you’ve only known each other a few months — and this is the time when you learn about each other and decide if you want to date and continue seeing each other. I get the feeling you are uncomfortable with his taking this slow — not wanting to have sex yet, going out in a group, making “bounce back” comments about the New Year’s Eve event…. and he’s very sensitive — that combo can be the basis for drama.

    My advice is that you take it slow and try to be upbeat. Don’t expect a commitment so soon, and don’t bring up the New Year’s Eve drama again. Let it go. He obviously likes you — but his relationship clock is ticking at a different rate than yours is. Respect his speed and be someone he wants to date — drama-free, fun, interesting, sexy. And let go of the “ick”. Focus on the positive.

    #46838
    Val Unfiltered💋
    Member #382,692

    babe he’s just keeping you on the hook. 😩 all that “i like you / i see a future” talk was a vibe in the moment, but now he’s playing the cool friend card to dodge accountability. classic disappearing act with a “hey let’s hang” encore.🙄 you don’t owe him another round of mixed signals. stop decoding crumbs and start matching his energy instead. watch how fast he suddenly remembers your name. 💋

    #47069
    Ethan Morales
    Member #382,560

    Here’s what’s happening: Dan clearly likes you he’s been inviting you to hang out, showing concern about the “third wheel” situation, and has talked about your future before. The problem isn’t that he lost interest; it’s that he’s sensitive, and the NYE incident hit him harder than it needed to. That’s why he pulled back for a bit.

    What you can do: Let go of the past drama. Don’t bring up NYE again. It’s over, and rehashing it only keeps him on edge. Take it slow. He’s pacing the relationship differently than you are. Respect his pace he wants connection, but not pressure. Be upbeat and fun. Be someone he looks forward to being around. Keep interactions light, flirty, and interesting. Avoid guilt trips or overexplaining.

    Focus on positive shared experiences. Go to the show, enjoy the music, the laughs, the time together. This strengthens your bond without forcing a commitment. Check your expectations. He’s not labeling things or moving quickly, so your attachment to immediate reassurance will only stress you. Let things unfold naturally.

    he still likes you, but he’s processing on his own timetable. Your job is to be present, fun, and patient, not to chase or convince him. Over time, he’ll warm up more as he feels secure again.

    #47496
    Marcus king
    Member #382,698

    It sounds like you and Dan had a real connection early on, but something shifted after New Year’s, and he’s been holding on to that night more than you realized. The moment you were on the phone might have felt small to you, but to him, it seems to have created doubt about where he stood with you and that doubt has been sitting in the background ever since.

    When people get hurt or unsure, they sometimes pull back instead of talking it through. From what you’ve shared, he’s gone from being emotionally involved to trying to protect himself, which is why he’s suddenly using words like “friends” and playing things off casually. That doesn’t mean his feelings are gone—it just means he’s keeping distance so he doesn’t feel vulnerable again.

    If you still like him and want clarity, it might help to just be open about it. Something like, “I’ve been a little confused lately. I really enjoy what we have, but I also feel like something changed after New Year’s. I just want to understand where you stand so I know how to move.” Keep it simple, calm, and honest.

    Whether he says he’s still interested or just wants to be friends, at least you’ll know where you stand. That’s always better than waiting and wondering while he drifts in and out of your life.

    #47779
    PassionSeeker
    Member #382,676

    Ugh, i feel this one deep. when a connection starts strong then fades into “we’re just friends,” it leaves you spinning. here’s the truth: dan’s mixed behavior isn’t about you doing something wrong it’s about him still holding on to that new year’s moment as proof that maybe you weren’t all in. it bruised his ego, and instead of talking it out properly, he went cold and started playing safe.

    but here’s the thing if he really wanted to be with you, he wouldn’t be this inconsistent. people who want you make it clear. the group invites and flirty-but-unclear messages? that’s him keeping you in orbit, not stepping up.

    you don’t need to chase clarity through guessing. if you still want to know, ask directly something gentle but firm like, “i’m not sure what we are anymore, but i’d rather know than keep wondering.” if he can’t give a real answer, take that silence as your closure.

    protect your heart, babe. don’t wait around for half-effort love.

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