[justfriends14]

Last year I had gotten out of a long term relationship. Shortly after one of my guy friends started acting differently around me. He used to never hug me when I was with my ex.
…Then all of a sudden he started hugging me when he saw me & when we said goodbye, he started calling me by a nickname, I’d catch him looking at me we’d both smile then look way, he would find ways to touch me by putting his head on my shoulder or casually putting his arm around my waist, he’d joke about making out, his friends would make remarks like “he’s such a nice guy any girl would be lucky to have him”, he complimented me on my new haircut/color saying “I like it” ..At first I was cautious around him because I didn’t think he thought of me that way, but then he started the above flirting so naturally I responded positively. ..Around christmas I told him I liked him (mostly because I was confused & thought he was just joking around with me & starting something new was not what I wanted at that time) and he said “I know, I’m not an idiot” I was taken aback, then he told me he started dating someone else.
…I asked him to stop doing the things he did when we were around each other. He said “you know me that’s how I act when I’m nervous”. I didn’t think too much of it but decided that I needed to move on, I was in school full time & working so didn’t need the distraction.
..Fast forward to mid summer. I had distanced myself from that group of friends because I didn’t want to be around him & his girlfriend. Finally I talked to a mutual friend and explained why I wasn’t hanging out with the group anymore, I told her all the things that had happened and she said that if he was dating someone back at christmas he wasn’t anymore & never introduced her to the group of friends. .
..So I gradually started hanging out with the group again. The first time in months that I saw him was on a float trip. When I got there he was pretty drunk but kept calling me by the nickname he gave me to join him in drinking, eventually he was sorta hanging on me (considering how drunk he was I didn’t read into this other than drunk’n behavior)
..His friends threw him in his tent & then pushed me in there as well giving me “instructions” in which they wanted me to do to him. I didn’t do any of that just got him to bed & laid with him for a while until he fell asleep, except he wouldn’t sleep just laid there with a silly grin on his face & I’d ask him if he was sleep’n he’d just say hmm mm.
..I finally left the tent. Next morning he smiled and said he didn’t remember a thing. The whole weekend he would sit next to me by the fire, at meals & we just hung out having a good time. His best friend (who I’ve only met a few times) asked me what happen in the tent, I told him nothing, he asked why & I said because I like him but I wouldn’t do anything like that especially since I didn’t think he liked me. His friend said “no he does like you”.
..Sat night I was pretty drunk and everyone on the trip made it obvious they were trying to get us alone, I don’t remember most of that night expect that I did tell him I liked him, he said “I like what we have, just hanging out” (or something like that) I then asked if he even liked me a little bit, he sorta hesitated saying “I like… just being friends” With how much I had been drinking & given the situation I started to get tears in my eyes. He then said “let’s not talk about this now, you’re upset & crying, let’s talk in the morning”
..So next morning my memory was fuzzy & there were parts that I didn’t remember, I avoided him & just packed up and left asap. A couple days later I felt bad about how he was nice to me in the morning trying to talk & joke around with me, but I sorta blew him off mostly due to embarressment, I messaged him to apologize & I played it off as if I didn’t remember the conversation but knew how I get when I’ve been drinking & probably said something about how I like him ’cause it’s no secret. ..I said I didn’t need or want that right now, just want to hang out and be friends (which is mostly true because I just finished school & looking for a job) He told me that I didn’t say/do anything dumb and that we are still friends.
..Recently I was at his friend’s b-day party & my crush’s parents were there. His friend introduced me to my crush’s mother as “her future daughter-in-law” I laughed it off and said no, but later his friend asked me what happened on the float trip and why we didn’t hook up, I just shrugged & said I don’t know. That night my crush & I just hung out with everyone and we were friends, maybe a little flirtation but nothing like it was a year ago.
..Of course I was being cautious not to start anything to jeapordize our friendship. I’m just confused as to whether or not he wants to stay “just friends” or if somewhere down the road he might be interested in starting something.
..His friends say he likes me and has expressed interest but I was told he has been hurt a couple times by girls who just want to be friends. I just wonder why he is giving me that line if he likes me and he has been burned by the exact same comment.

[April Masini, your AskApril]

Your title to this post is, “Does he want to be more than ‘just friends’?”

The answer is no. When a guy wants to date you, he will. This guy doesn’t. Sorry. Next! 😉

[b]Everyone likes to be liked! If the advice you found on AskApril.com was helpful “like” us on FB — and tell a friend!
[url][/url][/b]

[Member]

Posts