[Anonymous]

Well for starters me and my ex boyfriend dated for eight months didn’t really have any problems for the most part, I treated him like a king and he would tell you that. Let me back up, he dated this girl a year before we dated for four years and got hurt. He says the relationship wasnt good she was lazy and he got to the point to where he was use to being around her and ajusted to it then when she left he didnt know what to do. I have asked him straight up if he still have feelings for her, loves her, wants her back ,etc etc he says no he just wish he could get closure. So now two months down the line me and him are doing things together and having friends with benefits we talk every single day he spends the night with me. Its like we in a relationship but without the label. He says the reason why we are not in a relationship is because he is scared of change and me hurting him. I have asked if he was talking to any other girls etc he says no, but ive told him I am dating and I am (why am I going to sit around being depressed about something I cant do anything about) but ive tried pulling myself away from him letting go and its impossible I want to be with him. When I am with him an indescribable feeling comes over me and it feels right. I don’t know if I should waste more time with this boy in the process I desire to be more than just friends everyday, or should I just forget him completely and I don’t know if I have the strength. Please give me advice

[[hawt.n.bothered]]

Yepp, just forget about this guy. That’s a whole load of bullsh*t saying he is afraid of this and that, obviously he only wants to have a good time with you. But hey, friends with benefits? Then you shouldn’t be so cranked up about this whole affair stuff – no feelings involved. If you still want him, tell him how you feel but if he is still giving excuses he is not ready and stuff, letting go is the best choice.

[Ask April Masini]

Once again,[b] hawt.n.bothered[/b] is right. 🙂

You DO have a relationship with this guy, but he doesn’t want a commitment to you. He’s being very clear with you. You can’t make him be something he’s not or blame a past relationship on his not wanting to commit to you. Guys are either in or out, and this one’s out.

Your feelings are your feelings, but they don’t have to do with his. You like him a lot and he likes you enough to sleep with you, hang out with you, but not commit to you. I can advise you that it’s not a good idea to be so involved with someone who isn’t interested in committing to you. You’re going to end up very hurt and you’re going to try and try to play games with yourself and figure out why he’s not behaving the way you don’t want him to. That game is futile and you won’t win.

Instead, accept reality and understand that if you want a commitment and a committed relationship you have to find a man who wants the same thing. This guy is not that guy. Don’t waste any more time with him. Move on and find someone who’s your Mr. RIght.

I hope that helps. Let me know how things go. And join me on Facebook. Here’s the link for AskApril.com on Facebook: [url][/url].

[Author]

Posts