[Anonymous]

My boyfriend and I just recently got back together, after being together for about 4 months. I ended up getting pregnant shortly after we started dating. We were both really excited. He went to my appointments with me.

Then around the fourth month, he up and leaves me, with no reason as to why. A week before we broke up, I went to the movies with a guy friend of mine. He rarely ever gets out, so I figured while I was home for easter we could hang out. So, I brought him to the movies, but called my boyfriend when I got home to let him know that I had gone to the movies with a friend of mine that was a boy. My boyfriend thought that I liked my friend, even after telling my boyfriend that there was nothing between us and never would be.

So, as I’m coming home from easter vacation, my boyfriend calls me and tells me, he wants to break up and that he was furious that I could do something like that, even though nothing happened. Five minutes later, my boyfriend calls up and says he’s sorry and that he really loved me and wanted to raise this family with me. So, of course I believed him.

Then a week after that he wanted to break up again. This time he told me, that he didn’t love me anymore and that things weren’t going to work out and he didn’t want to try. To other people he told them different stories, like I was to controlling and what not. Although, after a week of being broken up, he told people he made a mistake breaking up with me.

So, I moved back home, after I learned that he was hanging out with some girl, but wouldn’t tell me. Talking to her early in the morning, when I was there, but told me he was talking to his mom. I found pictures of other girls in his room along with the fact that he was adding a bunch of girls on facebook.

After being apart for 2 1/2 months, he texts me, and tells me he still loves me and wants to try and work things out. Except, the whole time we were apart, he only called once to apologize for something, but never told me what. So, last week, I went down to his house to talk to him, to try and figure things out. We decided after our talk that we would get back together. He’s still adding a bunch of girls on facebook and won’t change his status to in a relationship with me. He told me, he didn’t think it was anybody else’s business. But he tells me he loves me.

I don’t know what to do anymore. Does he really love me and want to be with me, or am I just on the sideline for him? Any advice or opinions would really help. 😀

Sincerely,
Confused Girl

[Anonymous]

Gurl u are just his side kick to lean on u be stupid if u believe that crap and game
He’s trying to pull on u right now u need to focus on ur baby and tell him that u don’t want
To be bother guys are going to be guys and f*ck orther chicks while u be home thinking
About him don’t do it to ur self be smarter then that besides u derserve better good
Luck and hope u do the right thing for ur self and ur new baby.. 🙂

[Ask April Masini]

I’ve got to agree with [b]zamira[/b]. Your boyfriend is not very mature and he’s not making you feel valued or committing to the relationship in any meaningful way. Since you are going to become a mother soon, it’s probably a good idea to focus on yourself as a soon to be single mother. This guy is going to zap the energy you have that you should be putting towards your child.

Don’t look to him for your romantic, social or sexual needs. His mind is elsewhere. Instead, break up, get ready to be a mom, and make him responsible ONLY for his part in co-parenting your child together.

I know you’d like to hear something different, but he’s not boyfriend or husband material. Make the best of the situation since he’s the father of your baby, but don’t get married or live with him. You can do better.

I hope that helps. Let me know how things go — and how old you both are.

And join me on Facebook — I’d love to have you as a member of AskApril.com on Facebook at this link: [url][/url]. 🙂

[Author]

Posts