25 y/o American guy here. There’s a woman I like and value a lot, but there’s a couple problems. Normally I’d definitely say she’s interested, the way she looks at me, hangs on my words, laughs a lot, and so forth. But it’s harder to be sure because, while our ages are not too different, she was my English student, and students can be pretty adoring of teachers, even if it’s more “big brother” fondness at times than romantic feeling. So…I wonder if there’s any way to be sure, any little tests to find out the true feeling, without giving anything away. I’m not worried about myself–I can handle a no–but for her sake I don’t want to shatter the image she has of me (warm, caring teacher) by unnecessarily trying to bring romance into it.
The second hurdle is that she’s also close friends with another former student….who may also be romantically interested in me (the same issues apply with her, as far as being hard to really know). I like her a lot too, but we’re not a good match I think. My concern here is damaging their friendship. I don’t see either as really the jealous type, but I know I wouldn’t be too happy about it, if the roles were reversed, and my friend wins over a girl I really liked. But maybe I don’t understand women’s psychology in this case. Anyone have experience with this kind of thing?
I do like this woman a lot. That’s why I’m not quick to just say “it’s not worth it.” I’d need to get to know her better, but I think potentially we’d be a GREAT match…
