[summerxgirl718]

me and my ex boyfriend dated for about 3 months. things were really great in the beginning, he called me everyday, he always wanted to see me, we met each others families. he would take me out on dates and always told me how much i motivate him and how i’m amazing and the most beautiful girl he’s ever seen. he told me how my smile brightens up his day and every single day he wishes he could give me the world. he couldn’t wait to be my boyfriend and put it on facebook for everyone to see. Around july he was going through some things concerning his future and he started to seem distant. from that point on, things with him had been hot and cold.

he dated a girl for 5 years that cheated on him, and sometimes i felt as if he was emotionally unavailable. we went away for a weekend together and it felt like he didn’t even wanna touch me at times. we slept together once during that weekend and i had been trying to have it more but he just wasn’t into it. at that time i was so hurt and i knew his feelings were changing. sure enough, when we got home he told me he doesn’t feel as if he’s into it as much anymore, and he has been thinking about his ex and what she’s been up to and he reached out to her and she was nasty to him, etc. there was not much i could do at that point so i accepted it and was trying to move on. every single day since he broke up with me, he contacted me. he was texting me, calling me, etc. and i knew that he was possibly thinking that he didn’t make the right decision. sure enough one day he offered to bring me lunch but i declined and he told me he missed me and he was an idiot and he still has feelings for me.

he asked me on a date and things were great. we started hanging out more frequently and then he asked me if i wanted to date him exclusively, but we didn’t have the “bf gf” title. i said yes, and i had been eating dinner over at his house with his family, and things just seemed to be going really well. then one week he was focused on getting this one particular job and it seemed like he didn’t have much time for me. i would ask him to hang out and it was excuse after excuse. i knew something was wrong, but i wanted him to bring it up. he told me his feelings changed and he thought they would come back but they didn’t. i was extremely hurt because we had only been back together for a month and now it was just over again.

a week later, he’s already in a relationship with someone new. i know that she just came into the picture for a fact, and i don’t understand why he’s jumping into another relationship. it already sucks enough that he doesn’t have the same feelings for me, but now he’s already sharing his time with someone new? ughh it just sucks

1. do you think he ever had feelings for me?
2. why do you think his feelings changed? did i do something wrong?
3. doesn’t it seem quick to be in a relationship again?
4. do you think he will contact me/come back ever in the future?

[April Masini, your AskApril]

[quote]1. do you think he ever had feelings for me?[/quote]

Yes.

[quote]2. why do you think his feelings changed?[/quote]

He either wasn’t that into you to begin with, or he was and as he got to know you realized that the two of you weren’t as great a match as he had hoped. Or, he just met someone he liked better. This happens.

[quote]did i do something wrong?[/quote]

You probably banked on the relationship more than you would have if you’d known his feelings for you weren’t that strong.

[quote]3. doesn’t it seem quick to be in a relationship again?[/quote]

Not necessarily. It depends on the people, and frankly, you don’t really know what’s going on in their relationship. You’re just seeing it from the outside.

[quote]4. do you think he will contact me/come back ever in the future?[/quote]

He may come back to you again if and when this relationship he’s in, ends. But if I were you, I’d move on. He isn’t someone who’s proven that you’re worth his time — unless he’s between relationships. I know it’s hard to accept rejection, but reconsider it as a gift that will help you move in the direction where you’re wanted. 🙂

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[summerxgirl718]

he called me every single day and he would tell me how he hasn’t had a smile like that in awhile, and how he thinks that this is going to be a good thing. i definitely had a guard up, but i was interested in him and he told me he was interested in me as well. he would text me saying i’m the most beautiful girl he’s ever known, and that he never thought he would meet someone like me. he told me he couldn’t stop thinking about me. after our first date he told me he missed me and told me he told his friend how amazing i am. he asked me on a date that saturday night and he told me he liked me so much, and that he hadn’t stopped smiling since we hung out and wanted to hang out all day. he said “my mushy side comes out when i’m with you.” we would continue to talk on the phone everynight and he would text me after saying “another hour the world stood still and i didnt have a care bc of you” he was paranoid about his job situation because he wanted to be a cop, but couldnt find a job.

i was always giving advice and being supportive and he said “you ever get that feeling that one day really couldn’t get any worse and then someone comes along and just says or makes you feel important that you wanna give them the world..that’s you everyday, i really really like you.” i think we were falling for each other quickly..and he asked me to be his girlfriend at the end of june and we dated for about 2 months. i met his family, he met mine, and everything was really great.

this seems like he had feelings for me in the beginning while we were in a relationship and then they faded right? or does it seem like i was used the whole time?

[April Masini, your AskApril]

[quote]this seems like he had feelings for me in the beginning while we were in a relationship and then they faded right? or does it seem like i was used the whole time?[/quote]

Yes, it does seem like he had feelings for you and that then they faded. I don’t think he was using you. Sometimes relationships don’t work out because one person or the other just isn’t your (or his) cup of tea. It doesn’t mean either one of you did anything wrong. In fact, rejection is a gift because it steers you away from someone who isn’t interested and allows you to pursue and look out for those who are. 😉

[b]Everyone likes to be liked! If the advice you found on AskApril.com was helpful “like” us on FB — and tell a friend!
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