It sounds like you’re not ready to be with a woman who’s been with a friend of yours in such an intimate and long-lasting way. Before you beat yourself up over this, I’d recommend you accept who you are first, and then decide if a particular woman (this woman or any woman in your future) is right for you given your assets and deficits!
You knew that your current live in girlfriend had dated and had a baby with your friend before you started dating her, so the question is, did you date her to compete or get back at him, in the first place? If you did, that wasn’t a good reason to date someone. It had more to do with you and your needing to be complete in a way that involves beating out other guys. Until you deal with that problem so that you feel like you’re good enough even if someone you know has a fabulous girlfriend or wife, you’re always going to be looking over your shoulder in relationships.
Now that you’re living with your girlfriend and her son with your friend, you have to understand that this other guy is going to be a part of your girlfriend’s life and her son’s life — forever. So if you are going to be with her, you’re going to have to find a way to be understanding of the situation.
If you can’t (and again, I’d caution you about beating yourself up over this), then accept that you’ll never be secure knowing she was with your friend and will continue to be so in a platonic or loving, but at a distance, way because they have a child together, forever, and decide to move on.
In addition, you should know that any single mother with a one year old and only once a week help from the father of the child, is going to be exhausted, and may not have “girlfriend” time to give you. This is something you should weigh when considering dating a single mother, now or in your future.
I hope that helps get your head focused! Good luck. 🙂
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