While you and your girlfriend love each other, that’s not enough to sustain a relationship over the long term because you have full custody of a 14 year old son that your girlfriend is not ready to accept as part of your best life. 🙁 Love is terrific, but compatibility is what makes a relationship work. If she is not, as she freely admits, ready to accept your son as part of her relationship with you, there’s no chance for a future that involves anything more than what you have now.
You have to understand that from your son’s point of view, he MAY see your girlfriend as a take away for him. If she isn’t that interested in having him around on a regular basis, he’s going to see her as a threat to him if she’s in your life. This is not ideal for your situation.
Blending families, which is what you are going to eventually do — with this woman or a future girlfriend — is tricky business, but it can be tremendously rewarding and rich if you play your cards right. Finding a woman who has an understanding and acceptance of what you bring to the table is crucial for your happiness (hers, and your son’s). Your current girlfriend’s view that she’s not ready for “the kid thing” is fair. She’s not ready to embrace being a step parent in any meaningful way. Therefore, it’s time for you to move on and find someone who is.
Seeing her every other weekend when your son is not in the house isn’t going to make you feel better in the long run, as I’m sure you know deep down. 😳 You need to cut your losses (and hers) and break this off because there is no future. Start looking for Ms. Right — and YOUR Ms. Right is someone who wants to be a stepmother to your son. 🙂
I hope that helps. Let me know how things go.
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