[sakuramiyakawa]

we are in a LDR for about 4 & half months. We both love each other a lot & he also wants (promised me) me to be his wife/child’s mother in the future. we sometimes have big arguments &that gets settled pretty quickly. Recently though, he’s been very jealous about me because I chat with men on youtube (where my bf & I met) I don’t mean it so I tell him I just reply to their comments &I truly love him. later he says, “just talk to me.not others. you belong to me.” which is fine I don’t want him angry.yesterday I guess I made him angry or sad because he was going to go eat outside & I said in a happy way “have fun”& he said to me I’m happy not to talk to him (which isn’t true I’m very sad)later he said “don’t worry,study hard.find a husband” (I was also comparing myself with other girls and he told me to stop so I’m guessing that also made him irritated? He told me before I’m prefect for him no matter what. even if I’m chubby or not beautiful)I thought he was my husband & I became sad.should I worry? he said he only loves me not others. I’m 17, he’s 21. he will work soon. i’m worried he will find a better girl?he said he never thought about leaving me cheating me or he wont marry if not me. He only wants to love me and no one else. he also says he doesn’t want to lose me or let go of me neither do I. He always says sweet things like he is mastering english just for me or other cute things like I’m stupid (which I admit and I’m not angry about it) and that I get hurt so easily so he needs to be with me to protect me. I don’t want to break up with him or lose him. I really need to talk about this with someone. He’s the first boyfriend (I’m his first gf) to accept me and say he will protect me. Helps me feel better when I’m sad. He even said after he met me, I always gave him happiness even if I made him angry or sad and that he is doing so much better now because of meeting me. Anyway thank you for the help!

Also, I KNOW i should focus more on my future life but he is the one that helped me out from the gutter. I was suffering from depression well I was just not into anything and hated myself, etc but after I met him, he changed my life and helped me move forward. I know that if I let go of him just to focus on myself, I will fall again. I just want to know how to stop worrying that he isn’t happy with me or he doesn’t love me or just wants me for sex (we talked about sex but he knew it brought me back the bad memories I had in the past of being almost raped 5 times.. I know its difficult to control his hormones since he’s also a virgin but he only wants to do it with me and no one else. He also becomes sad that I don’t believe and I often doubt his love for me.) or thinking he will leave me. Any advice and also tips on how to make our relationship more strong might help as well. Thank you so much again! 😀

[April Masini, your AskApril]

The way not to be worried about a future with your boyfriend is to be more realistic. 😉 You’re 17 years old and you’ve been dating this guy for four months. That’s WAY too soon for him to be telling you he wants to marry you and have children with you sometime in the future. And if you believe him, it’s because you don’t have a lot of dating experience. Usually when you start dating someone you figure out by about the third month if you want to continue dating them or not. Then you figure out if you want to stop dating other people and to be monogamous. You’ve completely jumped the gun and made these commitments in your mind without the reality to back it up. So slow down. You’re dating a guy and it’s only been four months. Figure out if the two of you are actually compatible!

I know you’ve had a tough life and you’re afraid that your life is going to go back to that bad place it once was again, and that’s a legitimate fear. But you can’t hang those fears on this one guy. One man isn’t going to save you. You have to make changes in your own life so you don’t go back to a bad lifestyle.

Desperation isn’t very attractive to any man, and in order for you not to be desperate, you have to get your own life in order so that he knows you’re a good catch! Men stay with and marry women who make them feel proud and lucky to have them. If you want to be the kind of woman that men want to capture and win, then you have to become the prize. You can do it — but stay focused on what’s really important here.

I hope that helps. Let me know how things go, and please follow me @AskAprilcom on Twitter and on Facebook at this link: [url][/url]. 😀

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