[Anonymous]

My boyfriend and I of a year and a half were engaged 3 weeks ago. things were going pretty well for those 3 weeks and then he went to his parents one night and he decided we were moving to fast and he wanted me to just be his girlfriend, yes he took back his purposal. he originally wanted to wait until he was out of med school… 7 years from now… i kept asking why… why is marriage going to interfier with school? He said he wanted to have the money to afford an extravigant wedding.. yet he wants to pull out a loan for a motorcycle and move to a place where rent would be cheaper. he had even said that we could probably have a wedding in 4 years… which seemed alot more reasonable then 7. THen he told me he doesnt feel like its time to get married but he will want to get married eventually.. I don’t know if I can wait for SEVEN years… is he hoping something better will come along? is he scared that we wont make it to seven years? I always thought 2 or 3 years toether was a pretty amount of time to wait to get married? are our goals in life to different? should i cave and just wait it out? should he be willing to comprimise? Please help…

[April Masini, your AskApril]

I don’t know how old you both are, but basically, your boyfriend’s parents told him to call off the engagement and he did. My advice to you is to bolt. You don’t need a man who is a puppet to his parents — you need a man who can stand on his own two feet. You’ve given me no reason to believe his parents had a good reason for trying to break you two up, so I’m going to assume they’re just meddlers. And your boyfriend is under their thumb.

My advice is to move on. Asking you to wait seven years is unreasonable, and a deal breaker. Take his cue that he’s not interested enough in you to honor his own proposal and your acceptance, and find someone who is Mr. Right. This guy isn’t.

[Member]

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