[Christinaluvxoxo]

I have been in a committed relationship for a little over three months with a wonderful man. Our relationship got very serious very quickly. Within the first two weeks of dating we decided to become exclusive and we also started saying I love you around the same time. We I guess you would say fell head over heals for each other. He really is a great guy and treats me very well, but as time progresses I’m beginning to have some doubts about how he feels for me. He works six days a week, every single week which does not allow for us to spend much time together at all. However, Im starting to feel like he may be losing his feelings for me. Almost as if to say he’s getting bored with our relationship and he doesn’t want to do it anymore, even though he says that everything is fine I don’t know if I believe him or not.
He rarely says ” I love you” first anymore, he only wants to talk on the phone for a few minutes each day and that’s if he calls me, he almost never returns or acknowledges my text messages, and he doesn’t seem to want to make time for me. I know that he is very busy with work and he comes home tired everyday, however in the past that didn’t stop him from wanting to see me. He doesn’t hardly ever bring up sex and it seems to be just fine with him that we haven’t been together in a couple weeks and I don’t think it’s bothering him that there isn’t any prospect of us being intimate anywhere in the near future. When we first started our relationship he was such a gentleman, always opening the door for me, kissed me as soon as he saw me everytime he saw me, telling me how beautiful I am and how happy I made him, pretty much just gushed over me. And the thing that is stopping me really from going ahead and breaking it off is the fact that he hasn’t done anything wrong or changed how he treats me at all. We simply don’t see each other as much as we did in the beginning but when we do he still is very sweet and considerate of me and does tell me he loves me first on occasion, I’ve just been getting odd vibes from him.
I do not want to MAKE him be in this relationship with me but at the same time I don’t want to let him go either because I do love him and I want to make this work, I am seriously worried however that our relationship doesn’t mean hardly anything to him anymore, and it’s only been a few months. He still talks sweetly to me and still calls me baby, honey, and other pet names, and has not once brought up that he wants to seperate from me, but he is not putting any work into our relationship and I simply think that he doesn’t want to do it anymore but possibly for fear of hurting me, he won’t say anything. I have addressed this problem with him only two weeks or so ago and he said that he was sorry for making me feel neglected and that he would try to make it up to me, and that was working for a brief moment, but now things have settled back to the way they were…
Should I talk to him about this again, should I end the relationship, do I need to change some things?? Someone with some good sound advice please post a reply because I am in serious need of advice. The fact that I am having to post on this website about this issue really bothers me and I need to know if it’s worth fighting for…

[April Masini, your AskApril]

One of the reasons that moving too fast is a bad idea is because you don’t get to find out how he really feels about you. Sex changes things, and the L word does, too. Men have sex because they can — and they WANT a woman who makes them work for it. When a man sticks around and woos you and your relationship builds, and you’ve chosen with a clear head, then you’ve got someone worth investing in. But you had sex and used the L word too quickly, and now his true feelings are beginning to show, he’s less interested in sex or the L word, and you’re disappointed. 😳

My advice is NOT to have “the talk”. Men hate the talk, and if you’re having to have “the talk” you’re relationship isn’t where you want it to be, and “the talk” isn’t going to get it there. The bottom line is that his feelings have faded. Rather than pursue him, you can be alluring and seductive and see if you can get his attention with your feminine wiles, but if you can’t, accept that this isn’t Mr. Right, and that you’ve let the early-relationship sex cloud your judgment.

It’s important to wait to have sex and say the L word so you can figure out if this person is someone who wants to invest in the long run with you — and you with him!

I hope that helps. Let me know how things go, and please follow me @AskAprilcom on Twitter and on Facebook at this link: [url][/url]. 🙂

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