Hi April,
First, let me tell you how much your ebook and advice helped me during a very difficult period in my life to understand my self-worth and raise my self-esteem. You are just great and so inspiring!
In fact, your advice and guidance helped me find this great man, whom I had been dating for the past seven months; he is divorced four years now and has a little boy of six. We were immediately very much in love with each other, and he was almost from the start discussing moving in together; he had also expressed his wish to have a family again.He had introduced me to his son almost immediately, and I am the first woman he presented to the boy since his divorce. I was even spending weekends and evening together with his son, with whom we got along very well. We were almost inseparable with this man, always together.
At a certain point, we started having some arguments – we are both a bit dynamic and this was leading to some misunderstandings…in the first few he was very anxious to solve the issue and get back together but his make-up desire gradually got reduced. On the last one, in July, he decided to break up with me, saying that he alreay has problems with his ex-wife, he needs a more calm relationship and he sees that our relationship cannot move further, as we are incompatible characters. (just to clarify, the arguments were nothing too much…)
At the time, I had a discussion with him, and in the end we agreed to get back together. Again, everything was perfect, we had great holidays and all. During the holidays we had a talk on children etc during which, for the first time, he said that having another child is not his priority, which I found a bit astonishing as this was the first time I heard about it. So, another heated discussion took place, but it was resolved and he continued telling me about moving in together when we get back to the city.
When we got back, I didn’t see him for several days because he had his son and several obligations – but, I was sick and this made me feel very lonely. so, I got a bit distant with him, we met a few times but I was quite frozen, then one evening another silly argument came about and bang, he very calmly and decidedly informed me that he wants to break up. That was a few days ago.
I tried to meet and talk, impossible. So, I sent him a very calm mail explaining my understanding of the situation and the problem (that we don’t react calmly to arguments, we both have pressure in our lives etc) but I also expressed my very deep feelings for him and the future potential I see for us together. He replied also very calmly saying that we are simply not compatible, this is not viable for something more serious and he wished me all the best…again I sent a mail trying to counter his arguments, but since then, no reply…
I am devastated, cant stop thinking about him and what to do…on the other hand, I understand that no more action should take place from my side…
I just don’t know what to do. Seems I blew this big time. He is a good man, April, and a man who really loved me and had proven it on so many occasions…I don’t want to lose him. Please tell me, is there something I can do? A couple of days after our last contact he sent me a couple of messages to which i reply politely but he never proposes to meet and I don’t either, thinking he needs perhaps some space.
I will cherish your advice!
Many thanks,
izza
