[Will..Arnett]

I know I made my bed so lie in it, so no reason stating the obvious. I had a mistress for 2 years and she called and told my wife when I finally told her I would never leave my wife for her. My wife and I stayed together and trying to work it out. Now the mistress is threatening to give some info that she held back like my mistress and I having sex in our marital bed and our sexual activities which I feel is embarrasing. I think the wife may try to forgive, only because she kind of has low self esteem, but not entirely sure what she will do. My question is what do I do with my X mistress go back to her to keep her quiet?

I have been with her 2 years she knows where I live and work and contacting my wife twice to disclose information is not a crime.

She is blackmailing for us to get back together not for money. The additional info she has is damning and embarrassing. It includes a video I made of myself.

Wow. A lot of this makes me feel sorry for the X mistress. She is hurting too. I realize I did string her along with pretenses of me leaving my wife. I really thought I would, but changed my mind.

[April Masini, your AskApril]

You can’t control your mistress. But…. you can and should tell your wife everything. If you want to stay together with your wife, and the only thing that’s at risk is your mistress holding secrets that she’s threatening to reveal to your wife, you can take that power away from the mistress by telling your wife everything the mistress would. I know it’s upsetting to you because you have to admit adultery and betrayal, but it’s really the only way you can have a truly fresh chance at making your marriage work, and disarming your mistress of her power at the same time.

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