[Anonymous]

Ok I will tell you about the situation and then you can tell me if there is any hope for me at all. I was seeing this girl for a few months. She said it was love at first site and that every time we were together I gave her butterflies. Well I was working and could not spend as much time as I would like with her. Her friends kept telling her to move on. They introduced her to a guy. About a week later she said she still loves me, but wanted to back off for a bit. Well for a few days after that we did not speak much at all. Then all a sudden on after noon she texts me and asks what I was doing. We exchanged a few texts. Later that day she wanted to me to call her. She was crying and said she had been thinking about us and was missing that. She got off the phone hurriedly afterwards. The next day we exchanged a few texts general conversation. That afternoon she got some bad medical news and texts me wanting to talk so we do and she tells me all about it and said I was the only she felt she could tell. The next day we texted some more and talked on the phone some more. Same thing the next day. The conversations are general and nothing really about us. We make jokes like we did before and she will say stop before you make me cry. I will tell her I miss her, but she avoids a response saying she misses me. I have said well I enjoyed talking you today and she will say U2. I know she is telling her friends that the new guy is wonderful and she can’t stop thinking about him. She does not mention him much to me other than to say well I won’t be home tonight. She has another email that she asked me to use so it does not go to her phone because he checks it. I asked her why she said no reason. She was always telling me how special I made her feel. I asked her does he do that she tells me “somewhat”. We also talk via messenger but general conversation nothing major and she avoids saying miss u etc. I also had given her a special piece of jewelry. To my knowledge she still wearing it. Now that I have said all that my main question is in you opinion. Does she maybe want me back and is just waiting on my to do my part and make it where I can spend more time with her, or she just being nice to be to avoid hurting my feelings. I so need a woman’s perpestive. She has been the one to start the text conversation or has said u can call if you want. She has said I am a wonderful man but she just need to move on. Please give me some advice.

Signed Heartbroken Romantic.

[April Masini, your AskApril]

If she’s telling you she needs to move on, then you should take her seriously. By being so available as a “back up” to her new boyfriend, you’re not making her miss you the way she might if you were truly out of her life. In addition, women like men who aren’t necessarily nice guys. Guys who are too available and who don’t seem to have their own lives don’t come in first place in many instances.

My advice is to back off — completely. Let her know that you’re not interested in being friends. She’s got this new guy — let that play out without any help from you. She may realize she made a mistake letting you go — or else she may realize that she did the right thing. Either way, you won’t know until you move on.

I hope that helps, and that you’ll follow me @AskAprilcom on Twitter and on Facebook at this link: [url][/url]. 😀

[Member]

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