[sunflower333]

Met a guy 3 times via mutual friend 2015. This year he suggested via facebook to meet and flew out for dinner once. He lives in NY I in IL. Our intention: to seek partner for marriage. We have never been engaged, married & guard our chastity until marriage. This is quite normal in our culture/religion. I am 29 he is 37. We are both humble, career driven, and respect our families. While chatting, discovered our mutual friend he knew through online dating, but were not physically attracted to another. He sent me a text to confirm he enjoyed my company and called two weeks later. I inquired if he is on the dating site. He said yes, I met you 4 times only and its all spam emails. So I asked why not temporally deactivate. He goes I won’t deactivate until engaged. He said if I get a nice referral consider the guy too. I understand we are not exclusive. It’s a working progress to know someone, but I noticed a lack of communication. I occasionally initiate call/text and sometimes he responds. In a month I text about twice. So I asked him why is this, he said I would not be talking to you if I didn’t respect you & all is well. After this i contacted 3 times, 2 texts spaced 2 weeks and a month later I called. No response and it’s been a week since I called. Since the first dinner till now its been 5 months. he only ever called twice. He said he informs and parts ways with girls. He praised my beauty, kindness, humility but interaction lacking does not add up. If this is closure should I just text him a polite closure myself? I am tempted to if this is the case.

[April Masini, your AskApril]

This isn’t closure — but it isn’t interest. If a guy really likes you, he’ll date you more than once in five months. 😕

[sunflower333]

Thank you for your response but to add on, He travels for work as well as job interviews too. He works in the Financial sector for a firm but seeking a different job. Could this be why he doesn’t fly out to me or is it still a sign of no interest?

[April Masini, your AskApril]

No. Many guys have grueling jobs that take up a lot of their time — but if they’re really interested, they’ll make time for you. If he hasn’t asked you for a date in five months, I think you should move on. I would hate to see you waiting for someone who isn’t all that excited about you after all this time. 😉

[Member]

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